New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXFavorite New Girl Max Greenfield Quotes
I can do anything I put my mind to. I once figured out Alyssa Milano's phone number just by randomly choosing numbers.
Schmidt
Please take that off, you look like a homeless pencil.
Schmidt
Schmidt: Does it say "share stuff" in the Constitution of America? No, it does not. Nicholas, what does it say?
Nick: Don't share stuff.
You can't outrun the Jewish!
Schmidt
Shivrang's Aunt: Who is this?
Schmidt: I'm Gerard Depardieu. Who do you think I am, lady? I'm Schmidt.
Nick: Schmidt, I have to ask you a favor. It's about my clothes.
Schmidt: Burn them! Burn them all!
I'm going on a date with Elizabeth tonight. I haven't had sex with her since I was fat and accessing my penis was like getting a remote control out of the couch.
Schmidt
She's older--MUCH older--DEEPLY Korean.
Schmidt
Schmidt: No sig oths.
Cece: Just say "significant others."
Schmidt: Maybe you have that kind of time, but I'm on a tight sched.
Enjoy the break-up. If you need me, I'll be in my room, listening to some mainstream hip-hop.
Schmidt
There are plenty of things to be down about--the deficit, air pollution in China, "The Hobbit" wasn't very good...
Schmidt
Don't laugh when they call him "responsible," they don't know why it's hilarious.
Schmidt
