New Girl
Tuesdays 8:30 PM on FOXFavorite New Girl Max Greenfield Quotes
Don't laugh when they call him "responsible," they don't know why it's hilarious.
Schmidt
Cece: I thought I threw that thing out the window.
Schmidt: That only made it stronger.
It's only romantic because it's a wedding. I'd be just as happy to sabotage, I don't know, let's say, her tax audit.
Schmidt
Jess: Where are your nipples, man?
Schmidt: I'll never tell!
I wouldn't even begin to know how to steal a swag.
Schmidt
Schmidt: Here are some things you want to hide about yourself on tonight's date--you're cheap, you're a heavy drinker, you're broke, you have a problem with anger.
Winston: Your car is horrible.
Puzzle me this then, Winston-- how do you live with yourself?
Schmidt
Maybe none of us should go to this funeral. The early buzz on this thing is it's gonna be a real drag.
Schmidt
My face touched the mustache of a corpse today, Bobby. I'm not afraid of you.
Schmidt
Elizabeth: There are so many cool traditions at this thing! The groom comes in on a white horse!
Schmidt: So, basically, they're just copying my bar mitzvah.
Cease lovemaking! All lovemaking must cease!
Schmidt
I just got a treat, too. It's not candy. I'm not a dumb little baby like you.
Schmidt
