Lydia: Put this outside.
Elena: With that bobo in the White House I can't stand to look at an orange face right now!
Lydia: He's like a pumpkin, he'll get thrown out in November.

• Permalink: He's like a pumpkin, he'll get thrown out in November.
• Added: April 12, 2020

Schneider: The prize is an iPad mini, and I never win anything!
Elena: You're a rich, straight, cisgender white dude, you won at life!
Schneider: But I want an iPad mini!

• Permalink: You're a rich, straight, cisgender white dude, you won at life!
• Added: April 12, 2020

Alex: This isn't my costume. I dyed my hair.
Penelope: Like, permanently?! How could you do that without asking me?!
Alex: I did ask you. I said, "Mom, on Halloween, can I dye my hair silver?"
Penelope: Why would you use Halloween in that sentence, that is so misleading!

• Permalink: Why would you use Halloween in that sentence, that is so misleading!
• Added: April 12, 2020

Syd: Who knew Halloween was fun?!
Lydia: Literally, everybody.

• Permalink: Who knew Halloween was fun?! Literally, everybody.
• Added: April 12, 2020