C-Can we just take a beat to appreciate how magical this is? The three of us, reunited at last, investigating as one?


No, I just need to read two words. Two words I'll never forget. "Didn't sing." This is Maxine's review of my original show, but it was never published.


Loretta was right. You're a fucking pig. You're a fucking pig! You're a fucking pig. You... are... a fucking... pig! Pig! [panting] Pig! [oinking] You're a fucking pig! [oinking] [squealing] [snorts] Fucking pig!


Charles: Williams questioned everyone who crossed paths with Ben that night, and we can use those interrogations to make a timeline of that 30 minutes!
Oliver: Ah! I knew you were due for a good idea since your last one six months ago.

Doctor: Congratulations. It's a podcast.
Charles: Wah! [sucking]
Oliver: Mama!
Charles: Wah! Wah!
Oliver: Mabel... Mabel. Mabel! Mabel!
Charles: Wah!

  • Permalink: Wah!
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Loretta: Who goes there?
Detective Williams: NYPD, motherfuckers! The stalker, he didn't do it. He's creepy as fuck, but he didn't do it. The killer is someone in this room.

I was the best actress in the Midwest, according to an article in the Clayton Chronicle, where my dad was the editor.


Mabel: I have a lot to figure out. My gut keeps telling me it's Dickie.
Oliver: I told you to stay away ... actually, I don't mind Dickie. Not in the cast. Yes, let's go with Dickie. Dickie did it!

I did it! I killed Ben. Put poison in his disgusting protein drink before he went on stage opening night. And then I let him drink it. He showed up at the party, and I pushed him down the elevator shaft.


As a mother, you can't help it. You spend your whole life looking out for your child. Never ends. And you'll do anything to make sure they're OK.


Charles: I don't think she [Loretta] did it.
Oliver: Oh my God. That means she's a killer.
Charles: Why?
Oliver: Oh please, Charles. It's not like you're instincts on these things are famously good.

Oliver: Matthew Broderick! I've had sex dreams about this moment. How did you already nail that song?
Mathew: What can I say? I'm a vessel.
Oliver: Yes, say more. Or less. Just keep standing there so I can soak this in. Matthew Broderick! Broadway legend!