Sometimes being the perfect parent isn't worth the blood on the floor.

Camille

Clearly I don't know how to separate colors. Why you try to segregate my laundry?

Crosby

Zeek: Good for you for resisting when that boy, you know, was trying to get you to have intercourse with him. I'm so proud of you.
Haddie: Thanks Grandpa.
Zeek: You're welcome.

Camille: Change is healthy.
Crosby: No it's not, that's an urban legend.
Camille: Sometimes you just have to make a choice.

Realtor: Do you have a family?
Crosby: Uh, yeah, you know, it's complicated, but I did recently acquire a son.

Camille: Go get dressed.
Sarah: I am dressed.
Camille: No, really dressed.

Look at her flirting and giggling, it's like she's in the Sex and the City movie.

Sarah

Camille: I'm going to the market do you need anything?
Sarah: Could you get me a six pack of a different kind of intelligence.
Camille: What kind would you like?

If you don't start you're never going to succeed. I think you're afraid of trying.

Camille

Dude I'm so sorry. But believe me, if there's one thing I know, you don't want to cash in your V chip with a cliché, or a jerk, or douche.

Amber

I just want you guys to know the things I'm about to do with this blue cheese should probably be illegal.

Adam

Jabbar: Should I go back to bed and make believe I didn't see you?
Crosby: Yes, that's a good plan.

Parenthood Season 1 Quotes

Mom, I'm on my feet I'm not destitute. I've just got a little financial trouble and two degenerate kids, but I'll be fine.

Sarah

Max: Isn't the game today?
Adam: Well buddy I thought you were done with baseball.
Max: It's my team.
Adam: Games in 10 minutes everybody.