Parks and Recreation Season 5 Quotes
To be perfectly honest, Mouserat's music is not my thing. I really only listen to like German death reggae, Halloween sound effects from the 1950s, and Bette Midler. Obviously.
April
How did I not know that Diddy was on Instagram, you jagweeds?
Mona Lisa
Well, I dropped my cell phone in a bowl of cereal last week, idiot! If you had called me, you would have known that!
Andy
Dating Mona Lisa is awesome. Except I live in constant fear of my life. So I need to do the mature thing and get someone to dump her.
Tom
That is my band. I didn't recognize them without me because I'm the only one that matters.
Andy
I believe in cutting useless government projects. I also believe in cutting useful government projects.
Ron
The hug machine is here! Smiling on all cylinders!
Jerry
I'm gonna buy some sweat pants and a Nicholas Sparks novel. Might as well lean into it.
Tom
Tom: Ron, ask me if I'm sad.
Ron: No.
Uhhhh...you're on fire.
Donna
Andy will never be the new Jerry. Nothing embarrasses him. He is like a giant puppy with no shame.
Donna
April: Torturing Jerry was my favorite thing in the world. Next to making out with you.
Andy: Remember when we did that at the same time? It made him so uncomfortable!
