Rose: All this personal growth stuff is stressful.. it's hard figuring out who you want to be
Sage: Frankly I don't know why we started trying. Things were a lot easier when we just shopped... I blame Megan
Sage: Totally

I don't know if I'm ever gonna be the type of guy that can go number two in the woods

Zach

I don't need bullets points to make people agree with me, I have a black AMEX card for that

Sage

Rose [taking out knife]: This is a survival kit
Megan: Oh i'm gonna hate this story, aren't it?
Rose: You know how I moved in to my own room about a month ago after I found out you guys all lied to me about different stuff?
Megan: You decided to kill us and leave our bodies in the woods?
Rose: Wow, that's super dark megan

Megan: Some might say she's single handedly revitalizing the economy with her shopping addiction
Rami: Some might ask you to take that silver lining and hang me with it

I did the math and it turns out Smirnoff vanilla vodka is cheaper than artificial insemination

Keith

Marco: Waiting for a distraction is not a plan
Megan: Well it's less fattening than your turtle plan

Rose: I think you're way overreacting
Sage: Umm.. you're obsessing over a fat girl from spacecamp and I'm overreacting? My guy is a religious zealot!
Rose: He goes to church
Sage: Zealot
Rose: That does not make him a zealot...
Sage: Come on, you've seen The Da Vinci Code. What if he's the albino and flogs himself?

Owe! You're unusually strong for a little person

Charlie [to Megan]

You play and sweet and adorable but the truth is you're completely selfish. You're the worst kind of bad person cause you think your good but you're not. You're not a good person at all

Mandy [to Megan]

Megan [about Charlie]: When all is said and done, he's my best friend in the whole world and I have to say goodbye
Will: And what I'm saying is you've already kissed your best friend goodbye

Rose [about Luis]: What if he started avoiding you after you told him you never had sex before?
Sage: I would hate him.
Rose: Exactly. Almost as much as I hate emo

Privileged Season 1 Quotes

I'm warning you, Lily is a disaster. This is your china shop. If you want to, invite the bull.

Megan

You're Rose Baker. You're hot! Come on, the guy had bacne last year, he should be kissing the ground you walk on!

Sage