Resident Alien Season 1 Episode 5: "Love Language" Quotes
Isabelle: I'm very cross with you.
Harry: You sound like James Bond. [gritting his teeth to sound English] I'm very cross with you.
Isabelle: Since when have you got a job in Patience?
Harry: The town doctor was murdered, and now I am the town doctor because I am alive.
D'Arcy: Um, what the fuck did you just say to me?
Harry: [internal] Oh no. Human men must not say mean things to women. If I don't apologize, she will know I'm an alien. [to D'Arcy] That was mean. I should not have said THAT. I am a man, human man, and you are smart, relative to our species. Goodbye.
This is interesting. She's willing to send Jay away because she loves her not because she hates her.Harry
I'm feeling attacked. I am snowflaking.Harry
Harry: OK Max. I'm going to give you a simple test. Which one of these people is me.
Max: You know I can't tell by this. If there were a picture of a gross alien or a dumb slug, I'd point to it.
Asta: Are you listening to me?
Jay: This paper says you had a baby, and your baby was born on my exact birthday. It's fine. It's not like I didn't know I was adopted.
Wait. If you're mommy, then who's daddy? It's not that dick, Jimmy, is it? [silence] Wow. I really won the lottery with that one, didn't I?Jay
Harry: Humans lie. It's what they do.
Harry: Maybe they don't want people to know who they really are.
Jimmy: What the hell is he doing here? What? Is he your new boyfriend or something?
Harry: No. I'm just here eating cake.
Jimmy: What? Are you her bodyguard now?
Harry: I prefer ninja.
Asta: Harry, you don't have to do this. [to Jimmy] Just ignore him.
Harry: You shouldn't ignore ninjas.
Why is she still here? How am I supposed to get into my underwear and watch Jerry Orbach with that hot ham in my house?Harry
Isabelle: Well, dinner's over. What's next?
Harry: I can only think of one thing.
Harry: Scrub the pans before you leave.