Scream Queens Season 1 Episode 6: "Seven Minutes in Hell" Quotes
Oh give it a rest, Nancy Drew! Whatever your plan was, it isn't working. So if you'll excuse me for seven minutes, I'm gonna ask my boyfriend Chad Radwell to dial O on my pink telephone.
Chanel
OK look, I was waiting to talk to you about this because secretly I was hoping you'd be killed and I wouldn't have to hurt your feelings. I just don't think it would work out with us. You're nuts. And not like a typical crazy-ass co-ed but 'wake up with my penis in a jar' lunatic. Now that puts me in a tough spot because that also means you'd be the screw of my life. I mean that kind of insanity means your muffin is like Space Mountain levels of fun. I love Space Mountain. Best ride at Disneyland. But I love my penis more.
Chad
I'm sorry, the game's pretty damn simple, okay? It's truth OR dare. Alright? If you pick truth, you have to tell the truth; if you pick dare, it's gonna be really suspicious and I'm gonna think you had something to do with my sweet bro Boone dying and my rad bro Caulfield getting his arms and then his head chopped off!
Chad
Grace: The best way to avoid a shark attack is to not go in the water.
Zayday: We all have a crisis of faith sometimes. But no one is gonna tell a sisterhood with Zayday Williams as the president when they can and can't go swimming. So pull it together and let's go play this game of truth or dare. 'Cuz ain't nothing and no one stopping the hot tsunami of truth rolling through this house tonight.
We climb up the ladder, break the windows upstairs, save all the girls, climb back down, and it's vagina city for all of us.
Chad
Of course it's something to worry about. It's not your dad and his 1986 Miami Vice five o'clock shadow -- it was the killer!
Chanel
The guy I dated here last year got so obsessed with my ears he had to leave school. Now he writes me letters threatening to cut them off if he ever sees them again. Which is why I always wear my earmuffs.
Chanel #3
Roger: What about Chanel?
Chad: No, Chanel's good too, she's just -- when you have sex with Chanel, there's just, like, so much, like... crying.
Chanel: Sisters (and anyone else who might be listening), I present to you the acting president of Kappa Kappa Tau -- Zayday something!
Zayday: Williams. But that'll do.
Chanel #5: So you're not mad at me?
Chanel: Oh, I meant everything I said about you. I still think you're useless. I'm just not sad about it.
It's not my fault that because somebody is killing Kappas I didn't have time to individually bribe each and every one of you to vote for me!
Chanel
