Scrubs Season 3 Episode 6: "My Advice to You" Quotes
Carla(translated): So when I was a senior in high school, you heard me talking to my friends in English about going on the pill?
Marco(translated): No, I just learned English a few years ago.
Carla(translated): Well, good, because I wasn't on the pill, and I'm not now. I've never had sex. I hope it's fun.
J.D.'s Narration: I wasn't sure what I was hoping for... That somehow Danni had decided not to leave... that she'd snapped her leg in the parking lot...
J.D.: DANNI!?
Guy: Yo.
Dr. Cox: Newbie, maybe I wasn't clear enough with you on Miss Bartow over there.
J.D.: Here it comes. I'm incompetent. I'm a girl. I'm a little girl. I'm a little girl with pigtails that rides a tricycle.
Dr. Cox: No. Well, yes...
Turk: Hey, baby. Gimme some of that minty breath.
Carla: Noooooo, not in front of my brother - that stuff always makes him uncomfortable.
Turk: Oh, really? I just wanted to apologize for the way I've been acting by loving you up and down, and all around!
Carla: Turk!
Turk: Baby, he can't understand you! Now let's go put some more of your footprints on the ceiling!
Marco: That's it, you son of a bitch!
Turk: I told ya!
Elliot: Oh, first I've gotta discharge Mr. Hale, then get a extropolenscopy on Mrs. Peterson, and then, to be perfectly frank, perform a thong extrication on Ms. Reid.
Doug: Hey, your last name is Reid!
Elliot: Doug. I have underwear in my butt.
Danni: Well, I just wanted to say goodbye. I was gonna stick around for a few more days, but I don't really feel like that there's a reason to... Is there?
J.D.: Probably not.
Danni: I'm gonna miss you.
J.D.: I'm gonna miss you, too.
Danni: Dude, we just met - I was kidding.
Elliot: Well, you know the picture of us at the beach, where I actually look good and you think that you look like Bjork?
J.D.: Yeah.
Elliot: Well, I was hoping you wouldn't mind if I cut you out of it, and used it in a collage that I'm making for Sean?
J.D.: No problem!
Elliot: Thanks!
J.D.: Whoa.
Danni: How's the whole moving on thing going?
J.D.: It's going great, Danni! In opposite world!
Elliot: J.D.! You know all those pictures of us from when we were going out? Do you still have those?
J.D.'s Narration: Filed alphabetically in my "Elliot Cabinet".
J.D.: I don't know... I might... Why?
Turk: Baby! There you are. He speaks English!
Carla: Who?
Turk: Your brother; he speaks English. Yo, tell her you speak English!
Marco: Que?
Turk: Don't "que" my- "Que," my ass! "Que," my ass!... You were there, and you saw the whole thing. Now you tell her.
Janitor: I don't know what you're talking about.
J.D.'s Narration: Of course, if the dynamic does change, it's never as simple as you'd hope.
Dr. Cox: Hey, Newbie, listen, I got dinner plans with Jordan, and seeing as you're on-call, whatta you say you pull up a chair, here, in front of Miss Bartow?
J.D.'s Narration: ...Especially when it involves someone who's used to you following their lead.
J.D.: Look, Dr. Cox, I'll take care of her, and I'll have my interns help, but you gotta know I have other patients, too, so...
Dr. Cox: Maybe you didn't understand me, there, Violet. I don't want you leaving her side, even if someone thinks they saw Justin Timberlake downstairs.
Turk: Queso?
Marco(translated): Man, I am so sick of you.
Turk: I'm sorry, but I... can't... understand... you!
Marco: Yeah? Well, that talking slower and louder thing is not as helpful as you might think. Geez! Can you believe this guy?
Janitor(translated from spanish): Don't get me started.
J.D.: Oh! Hey, how are you?
Danni: Good. So, I did it - I talked to my ex.
J.D.: And...?
Danni: And I said, "Congratulations on the wedding, and I hope you two stay happy, and, by the way, size does matter."
