Scrubs Season 1 Episode 13: "My Balancing Act" Quotes
Elliot: Talk to me... Talk to me...
Carla: You know, that's really getting annoying. In fact, every time you say it, it makes me not want to talk to you all the more.
Elliot: Talk to me...
Carla: All right! Fine!
So, when I saw you in the hall this morning, and I said, "How's your penis?" and you didn't want to talk about it...
Todd
Turk: She's not having an orgasm.
Todd: Still not seeing what the problem is.
Hey, uh, Alex, I am so sorry; but I went to the restaurant, I guess I just missed you. And then I-I called your house, but there was no answer. And then I actually stopped by your house, and I guess you didn't see me - which was sort of odd, 'cause I was standing next to the pizza guy while you were paying him
J.D.
J.D.: Alex dumped me.
Dr. Cox: Aw, you mean the blind girl you've been dating?
J.D.: She's not blind.
Dr. Cox: Of course she's not
Elliot: Listen, Carla, I can't even pretend that I can give you tips on intercourse...
Carla: I got one for you - stop calling it that.
Elliot: My therapist thinks my trouble in bed stems from a basic fear of intimacy. But I just think it's just because any type of repetitive motion makes me nauseous. Oh, and since I was a little kid, I've always had nightmares about being crushed.
Carla: That poor shrink
Turk: Baby, there's nothing that could scare me away.
Carla: Ever since we said "I love you" to each other, I've been feeling all this pressure, and wondering about the future - our future. Like, are we gonna get married? Are we gonna have kids? If so, how many, and when will I get my figure back? Should I keep working? Where're we gonna live? Is my mother gonna live with us? How big a house do we need? How many bathrooms? What if my mother walks in on you while you're in the bathroom, you slip and fall, and I can't afford the funeral costs?
Turk: Okay, that's a little scary