Scrubs Season 1 Episode 19: "My Old Man" Quotes
Janitor's father: Hey, hey, hey, hey! You missed a spot right there!
Janitor: You know, lucky for me, Dad, I spend my life making a big circle around this place cleaning up after sick people so tomorrow I'll probably be here around the same time.
Janitor's father: You know that I hate sass! So just drop right down and give me twenty.
Janitor: Dad, that could be fecal matter.
Janitor's father: Make it thirty!
J.D.: Well, he did some considerable emotional damage, so...
Dr. Cox: Every one of our parents does some considerable emotional damage and from what I've heard it just might be the best part of being a parent. Now, if some guy ever does put a ring on your finger and you're lucky enough to pop out a youngster, I'm sure you'll understand but for now trust me when I tell you that I wouldn't care if today was the first time you ever met your daddy
Turk: All right, Elliot, at the presentation I was wondering, can I do the ending? Because I really love the ending of our paper.
Elliot: Do you think I'm cut out to be a doctor?
Turk: Okay, fine, you can do the ending. I just want to say, "Thanks, folks! We've been great!"
Elliot: I'm serious. Do you think this is what I really want to do?
Turk: Elliot, I don't know.
Elliot: You can tell me. I can take it.
Turk: No, Elliot, I'm saying I don't know because I really don't know. What the hell is going on here? Why have all women gone crazy?
Carla: I just freaked out because your mom and I have so much in common.
Turk: So?
Carla: I don't know, I got this crazy idea that you only fell for me because I'm just like your mom.
Turk: Aw, baby... That's exactly why I fell for you.
Carla: Okay, I'll probably just have a friend pick up my stuff...
Turk: No, wait, sit down. What's wrong with wanting to be with someone because they're smart and independent and always looking out for you? Okay?
Carla: Yeah.
Turk: Okay.
Carla: But if we ever get married, we're gonna have to talk about this in therapy