Seinfeld Season 3 Quotes
The truth? You want the truth? It is your earrings! It is the chopsticks, but it's so much more! You're pretentious! You call everyone by their full name! You call my doorman, Sammy, "Samuel" but you didn't even say "Samuel", you went "Samuelle!" Papie-ay mach-ay? What is papie-ay mach-ay?
George
Elaine: And now you're being audited for it. See, that's Karma.
Jerry: No, that's Kramer.
Elaine: You're extremely...careful...with money.
George: I'm cheap? You think I'm CHEAP? How could you say that to me? I can't
believe this. How could you say that to me?
Elaine: You asked me to!
George: You should have lied!
Elaine: HUH, so should you.
George: I mean I'm not really working right now.
Elaine: I know.
George: When I was working I SPENT baby!
Jerry: Yeah, I know champagne, limos, cigars.
Elaine: What is this?
Kramer: Well, it's a windshield. It's going to be your new coffee table.
Elaine: Ah, I'm going to kill myself on that thing. You can't even see it.
Jerry: You'll sense it.
The IRS! They're like the Mafia! They can take anything they want!
Jerry
(all to Elaine)
Kramer: So is everything cool?
Tina: Yea, you seem a bit dysfunctional.
Pity is very underrated.
George
George: They give you those word association tests. I love those.Jerry: That'd be great. There's no wrong answer.George: Potato.Jerry: Tuberculosis.George: Blanket.Jerry: Leroy.George: Grass.Jerry: Tuberculosis.
Kramer: Blame me.
Jerry: No, I blame myself.
Kramer: No blame me.
Jerry: OK, I blame you.
Kramer: What don't blame me.
Elaine: Who walks into a women's bedroom without knocking?!
Kramer: I thought it was a closet.
My cousin Douglas was in a place like this one time. He came over to my house for dinner. There was no soda and he went berserk. He was screaming. "Where's the Pepsi, where's the Pepsi?"
Jerry
I was audited last year. At first I thought well, IRS kinda sounds like Toys 'R Us maybe won't be so bad.
Jerry
