South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 3 Episode 11: "Chinpokomon" Quotes
I love you. Let's be best friends and destroy American Capitalist government!
Chinpokomon doll
Down with America!
Chinpokomon doll
We love Chinpokomon too! It's super toy number one!
Randy
Stan: Dude! The video game just gave Kenny a seizure!
Cartman: Ah, sweet! This game's cool!
Jesus tap-dancing Christ Kyle, get with the program!
Cartman
Chinpokomon Executive: You have such a large penis.
Sharon Marsh: What??
Chinpokomon Executive: Your penis, wow!
(Mr. Hosik slaps his executive and pushes him aside)
Mr. Hosik: What he means is all MEN in this town have very large penis.
Sharon Marsh: Can't you see what's happening? They're just using their talk to distract you! He doesn't really have a small penis!
(Mr. Hosik pulls down his pants, everybody looks shocked)
Sharon Marsh: Oh.
For the last time I am not Garrison-san! and this is not Hat-san!
Mr. Garrison
(From the 'Wild Wacky Action Bike' commercial)
Singer: Wild, Wacky Action Bike! Very hard to drive!
Narrator: Wild Wacky Action Bike is impossible to steer. And it glows in the dark!
(Singing on the streets) Come on, people, join together. Join-together-so-I-can-get-more-money-for-ChinPokoMon!
Cartman
Gerald: You see, son, fads come and go. And this "Chin-po-ko Mon" is obviously nothing more than a fad. You don't have to be a part of it. In fact, you can make an even stronger statement by saying to your peers, "I'm not going to be a part of this fad, because I'm an individual." Do you understand?
Kyle: Yes. Yes, I do, Dad. Now let me tell you how it works in the real world. In the real world, I can either get a Chinpokomon, or I can be the only kid without one, which singles me out, and causes the other kids to make fun of me and kick my ass.
Gerald: Hmm. Good point; here's $10. On second thought, here's $20 pick up one for your brother too.
My fellow Americans, I wish to address the concerns many of us have over the growing number of Japanese military bases forming in the United States. The new Japanese emperor, Hirohito, has made our own children into fighter pilots who will soon fly to Hawaii and attack Pearl Harbor. I spoke with Mr. Hirohito this morning, and he assured me that I have a very large penis. He said it was mammoth, dinosauric, and absolutely dwarfed his penis, which, he assured me, was nearly microscopic in size. My penis, he said, was most likely one of the biggest on the planet. I applaud Mr. Hirohito in his honesty. Thank you.
Bill Clinton
Dude, you're just jealous because I'm Chinpoko Master!
Kyle
