I demand macaroni pictures.

Moses

• Permalink: I demand macaroni pictures.
• Added: February 20, 2010

Sheila Brovflofski: Kyle and Ike, be safe, and Kenny, try to act Jewish.
Kenny: (muffled) How do you do that?

• Permalink: Kyle and Ike, be safe, and Kenny, try to act Jewish. How do y...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Jubilee Director: We have all gathered here tonight, from every chapter of Judiasm.
Elder #1: Elder Schwartz, orthodox chapter.
Elder #2: Elder Harris, reform chapter.
Elder #3: Elder Garth, anti-semitic chapter.
Jubilee Director: I've never heard of the anti- semitic chapter of Judiasm before.
Elder Garth: We're new.

• Permalink: We have all gathered here tonight, from every chapter of Judiasm...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Moses: And let us glue paper plates together with beans inside so when you shake them they make rattling noises.
Rabbi: Paper plate bean shakers, of couse!
Moses: And let us put patterns of glue on the outside and sparkles so they look all nice and sparkly.

• Permalink: And let us glue paper plates together with beans inside so when ...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Moses: The impurity must depart before the great eating of carrot cake.
Kyle: He doesn't get cake!?
Moses: No. No cake for the impurity.

• Permalink: The impurity must depart before the great eating of carrot cake....
• Added: February 20, 2010

Squirt Leader: Okay, Squirts, the elders have given us a very important task tonight. We are all going to make macaroni pictures, like this one, using dry macaroni, paper, and glue.
Squirt: How come we have to make macaroni pictures?
Squirt Leader: Because that's what Squirts do! Now, shut your pie-hole!

• Permalink: Okay, Squirts, the elders have given us a very important task to...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Gerald: Tell Ike how much fun Squirts is, Kyle.
Kyle: What? You want me to lie?
Gerald: Yeah, lie.

• Permalink: Tell Ike how much fun Squirts is, Kyle. What? You want me to...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Kyle: Mom? Can Kenny go to Jewbilee with me?
Sheila: Uh well, Kyle, Jewbilee is sort of a special thing.
Kyle: Oh. Kenny isn't special?
Kenny: (Aw.)
Sheila: No, no, you're very special, Kenny. It's just that well, Jewbilee is for Jewish kids.
Gerald: You see boys, Jew Scouts is a special group that borrows a little bit from all different Jewish denominations. From the Orthodox Jews, from the Hasidic Jews, from the Northern Italy Cave Jews But you have to believe the basic tenets of Judaism to be a Scout.
Kyle: Kenny'll believe whatever you want him to.
Kenny: (Yeah.)

• Permalink: Mom? Can Kenny go to Jewbilee with me? Uh well, Kyle, Jewbil...
• Added: February 20, 2010

Squirt Leader: Okay, Squirts, let's see what you made macaroni pictures of. Ishmael?
Ishmael: Apple.
Squirt Leader: Good. Matthew?
Matthew: Cat.
Squirt Leader: Joseph?
Joseph: Triangle.
Squirt Leader: Okay. Ike?
Ike: Cokeshen.
Squirt Leader: You don't make a macaroni picture of the Last Supper at a Jewish camp!

• Permalink: Okay, Squirts, let's see what you made macaroni pictures of. Ish...
• Added: February 20, 2010