South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 2 Episode 6: "The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka" Quotes
Producer: Our ratings have gone up to twenty people.
Jimbo: Does that mean we get more money?
Producer: No, but I do!
Jesus: Welcome back. Now, Jimbo, would you please tell me why your nephew do stuff like this to you?
Jimbo: Well, I'll tell you, Jesus... It's because he takes drugs and he worships the devil!
(The people in the audience gasp.)
People in audience: (chanting) Jesus! Jesus!
Jesus: Wow, Stanley! Now your uncle sounds really worried for you!
Stan: Well, I only did it because he... MOLESTED me!
(The people in the audience gasp again.)
Jimbo: Why, you little piece of crap...!
Stan: You big piece of crap!
Cartman: That's it! Now I'm all pissed off! (Cartman throws a chair at Ned) Take that, hippie!
Jimbo: Hey!
Shut the f**k up!!! Jesus, what is wrong with you people?!
Jesus
Whoa, Dude. I don't take drugs and worship Satan!
Stan
Cartman: (while in a dress) Why do I have to be the old lady?
Kyle: Because your fat and all old ladies are too!
Cartman: Hey!
Vietnam was more like shoving shards of broken glass up your ass and sitting in a tub of tabasco sauce fun.
Jimbo
Kyle: Are there any questions? Yes, Mr. Garrison?
Mr. Garrison: Yes, where the f**k did you hear this ridiculous load of bulls**t?
Kyle: From Vietnam veterans.
Good job, Ned! Now they won't starve!
</i> Jimbo
(During Mr. Garrison's Vietnam flashback)
Troop: Ok, who's taking a shower first?
Rest of the Troops: OOOOO OOO ME ME!
Jesus: In our competition for ratings, we all lost sight of why we got into showbusiness in the first place.
Ned: Yeah. Titties and beer.
Jesus: Actually, I was referring more to the pursuit of truth...
Kyle: We're sorry for turning Ned into a vegetable.
Jimbo: Ah, he'll be fine. I'll just take him home and show him some good hardcore porn and he'll snap right out if it.
We're so glad you spent your time with us while we slaughtered our way through nature's guts come again and stay a while we'll kill a lot more living things and make them bleed.
The 'Huntin and Killin' theme song
