South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 4 Quotes
Mrs. Hankey: (to Mayor's aide) You wanna bet me I won't take off my clothes and run naked through this parking lot?
Mr. Hankey: Honey, please don't start.
Mrs. Hankey: I didn't start it! He was lookin' at my breasts!
Mr. Hankey: They're not real, ya know!
Mrs. Hankey: Don't you say that!
Mr. Hankey: Oh, big secret, everyone can tell they're made of silicorn!
Linda: Just point us to a phone kid, alright?
Cartman: (laughs) I'm afraid you'll find all the phones... quite out of service.
Mark: No phones either! How do you communicate?
(Cartman pics up a jar, opens it up and speaks into it)
Cartman: Butters, I need an ETA on a car, stat! (closes the jar and hands it to a kid who walks out the door)
Mark: Alright we've had just about enough here. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. I don't care what little games you kids want to play, we just want out of here alright.
(Kid walks back in room with the jar & Cartman opens it)
Butters: (voice from jar) It's gonna be about 3 days.
Mark: Let me get this straight. If I go get the fat kid's book on the other side of the white line, you'll show me where a cell phone is.
Stan: Yes, no foolies!
Kindergarten Kids: No foolies!
You got "Raging Pussies" tickets!?!
Kyle
Parents can be pretty cruel sometimes dude. They get off on it.
Stan
(Mark and Linda find Kenny's skeleton)
Linda: What is it?
Mark: It's a boy. They... killed him.
Linda: The bastards.
Craig: This is the end of Smiley Town. The only phone is somewhere in Treasure Cove. If you want to find it, your gonna have to cross the white line.
Mark: Well can you help us find the phone please?
Craig: Hell no! I'm not crossing the white line.
Linda: Why not?
Mark: Okay let's just go Linda. I don't have time for Spaceman Spiff's little games.
Craig: Craig!
Mark; What?
Craig: It's Spaceman Craig. (walks off making space noises)
Jenny: Now we wanna play with yoou.
Mark: Ok, now I'm scared too. That freaked me out.
Stan: Dude! You're not gonna believe what Cartman got!
Kyle: Hepatitis B?
Cartman: No dickhole! 4 tickets, 28th row for the "Raging Pussies."
Kyle: My parents said I can't go.
Stan: Well of course your parents said you can't go.
Cartman: Dummy, you don't ask if you can go! I'm telling my parents that I'm staying at Stan's house, Stan's telling his parents he's staying at Kenny's house, and Kenny's not telling his parents anything cause they're alcoholics and they don't care!
Kenny: (muffled) Yeah!
Kyle: Oh, well now I already told them.
Cartman: Well I guess you're screwed then.
(singing) If I had one wish it'd for Cuba to change,
Kyle
cause I think that all the Cubans are in pain.
All the joy in the world, from sea to shining sea,
doesn't mean a thing, if Cubans aren't free.
I just can't be very happy, that's certain,
not as long as you Cubans are hurtin',
Oh won't you search your soul and find a way to change your mind.
That is my one and only wish...
Sheila: Alright, fine Kyle, you can go to the Raging Pussies concert if you clean out the garage, shovel the driveway and bring democracy to Cuba.
Kyle: What's Cuba?
Gerald: A communist country run by a dictator named Fidel Castro.
Kyle: And do I have to shovel the whole driveway or just the side the car's on?
Sheila: The whole thing.
Kyle: Ah jeez.
