And they all lived happily ever after, except for Pocket who died of Hepatitis B.


Oh what a gay time we shall have, and I do mean gay as in festive, not as in penetration of the bum.


Pip: Joe, do you know anything about girls?
Joe: Sure. They're those things with vaginas in them.
Pip: Yes, but do you know anything about them?

Ahhh...Dickens. The imagery of cobblestone streets, cragging London buildings, and nutmeg-filled Yorkshire puddings. Hello, I'm a British person.

Malcolm McDowell

Estella: This way, you pathetic squirt of vaginal discharge!............This way, you beef-witted shriveled-up monkey's penis!.............Up here, you gamy mass of baby vomit!
Pip: Eho. After you, miss.
Estella: I'm not going in there, you stupid puddle of a homeless man urine!

What are you doing here you little wippersham?


I sometimes have sick fancies.

Ms. Havisham

STOP your metal orange, you bastard! You never want a tablespoon of nigh'ingale droppin's, you me'al-poundin' fairy! And you! Why don't you get a job?! You're eight years old now!

Mrs. Joe



Producer: What the hell is that?
Cartman: Thats Gobbles. The physically challenged turkey.

Cartman: Kyle, why do you do these things to me?
Kyle: I didn't do anything to you; Timmy saw the turkey and wanted to get it, what did you want me to say to him?

Actor: (singing) Why not use a trick we actors use, cover your eyes and ears to see what it would be like to be blind and deaf. See what plays inside your mind.
(Cartman does so and it is followed by a montage of horrific scenes, the holocaust, someone on fire, grizzly operations, a dead rat being eaten by another rat, etc.)
Cartman: (takes off blindfold and ear muffs) WHOA!
Actor: Anything useful?
Cartman: No, just the stuff i usually see when I close my eyes.

South Park Season 4 Quotes

It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a woman's separation, this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

</i> Cartman

Cartman: Suck my balls.
Ms. Choksondik: Present them.
Cartman: What?
Ms. Choksondik: Present: Whip them out and I'll suck 'em.