No matter how bad you screw up, you always get a second chance.


No matter how mad your sister gets, it's not gonna scare me away.


Women like Dex and me, you'll spend your whole life trying to figure us out.


You know, I had this whole cover story about a flat tire, but it feels very elaborate now, so I might as well just tell you, I came back because I wanted to see you again.


The taco trade; it ain't for kittens lieutenant.


It's like I put it out there to her, and I don't know if I'm feeling something or just looking at it as a challenge.


What the hell lady, what are you doing? I was just trying to grab a selfie.

Random guy

If you wanna get lucky tonight, let's stop talking about bowling.


Petey: I didn't ask, and he wouldn't have told me. Obvi.
Hoffman: Obvi?
Petey: Teenage granddaughter

Dex: The truth is I drink a little bit too much sometimes, my best friend is a felon, and I haven't been able to hold down a real job in about ten years. But this, this I'm good at. I don't know why, but I am, and you seem pretty cynical about the whole thing, and maybe one day I will be too, but from where I'm sitting right now that chalupa is smelling pretty damn good. Yeah, wrong answer.
Janet: It was honest.

Frank: That's interesting. I've never had a bloody mary, with what is that, pineapple juice?
Dex: It's a work in progress. Aren't we all?

Good question. The reason we're rushing is because I'm an escaped convict, and it's not really in my best interest to spend too much time in any one location. I would love to just chill here in Portland for a few weeks, hit up some microbreweries but that's just not in the cards. So, anyone else have anything to share with the group? Comments? Concerns?


Stumptown Quotes

Ansel: I wanted to see how much you lost.
Dex: Punk.

  • Permalink: Punk.
  • Added:

Dex: Well you know what they say in Pashto, he who spreads his own goat dung is bound to step in it.
Guy: Pash-
Dex: To. Yeah, it’s what they speak in the stan.
Guy: Yeah.
Dex: Yeah anyone who actually served there would know that. Your dog tags don’t match the name on your credit card and nothing about your car keys says rental, so I’m guessing you’re not in from out of town either. I know you asked if I was from around here figuring we could go back to my place probably ‘cause there’s a woman back at yours.
Guy: Uh.
Dex: Hesitation, it’s when your body says yes before your mouth can say no, i.e., until you get your lies straight. I’m pretty sure only one of us is getting lucky tonight.