Superstore
Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBCSuperstore Quotes
You're in an impossible situation. We all are. And I don't know; something has to change.
Jonah
Hey, uh, I know you're probably busy, but a customer just bought us some beer, and we are celebrating. Or numbing the pain, I can't really tell which.
Jonah
Amy: Looks like the sheep are starting to eat each other.
Jonah: Do sheep eat each other?
Amy: Isn't that what haggis is? I don't know, Dina said something.
We are essential. Customers are like sheep looking for guidance. Without leaders, sheep start to eat each other. So unless one of us leads, this place is gonna be littered in haggis from here to Sunday.
Dina
Attention shoppers, we ask that you please not physically wrestle things from your fellow customers. There's a highly contractable virus out there that our country does not have a hold of. None of y'all are listening, huh? Alright, enjoy the apocalypse!
Garrett
I'm qualified for this job because I have 17 years of experience, and I know everything there is to know about our customers. But, if all you're looking for is somebody with a spicy last name, then I suggest you keep looking.
Amy
Jonah: You got the job?
Amy: I got the job.
Amy: So, you don't think I'm selling out?
Jonah: I think you're right. You gotta do this.
Amy: Well, I appreciate that. But there's so much to think about. I mean, there's the kids, and what am I going to do about Emma's school? Then there's this guy that I'm seeing in St. Louis...
Jonah: Well, maybe that guy you're seeing should just go with you.
Amy: Oh. Wow. You mean he would just move to California? For me?
Jonah: Yeah. I mean, why should you be the only one gets a taste of that sweet public transpo?
Amy: Yeah, but their water resource management is...
Jonah: I can overlook it.
Amy: Okay. Yeah. Let's move to California together.
Dina: She's gonna kill it out in California. I mean, professionally. She's gonna take a major hit in the hotness rankings.
Jonah: So, you're okay with Amy leaving?
Dina: Me? Oh, no. I hate it. I'm gonna go home and stress eat an entire jar of olives. But, this is pretty huge for her.
Jonah: Yeah. Yeah, it is. Yeah. It's good that you're being so supportive. I went a different direction with it.
Jonah: It's just lunch! You're great at lunch! You do it every day.
Amy: Yeah, but your family's gonna be there. And you know my eating style isn't for everyone.
Amy and I just had a lovely talk in the bathroom. You know, what she and Jonah have is something really very special. I deserve someone who loves me like that. We'll talk later. Just letting you know, I want a divorce.
Marilyn
Brian: Oh, wow. You're not just the assistant manager, you're like a detective. That is cool. Do you ever need any backup?
Dina: No. No. Never work with a partner. They're either dead weight or they turn on you. Oh, wait! You meant you.
Brian: If that's okay...
Dina: Oh, yeah!
Brian: Yeah?
Dina: This is great.
