Hyde: So what'd you get?
Eric: ID bracelet.
Hyde: Cool. Your name on it?
Eric: Yeah. What'd you get?
(Hyde opens his gift)
Hyde: Tube socks.
Eric: Good! I mean... Tube socks are good.

Hyde: Look, Jackie, I know this girl, right, and I want to get her a Christmas present.
Jackie: Oh my god, it's Donna!
Hyde: It's not Donna.
Jackie: Okay, it's not Donna. So, how much do you have to spend?
Hyde: Six dollars.
Jackie: You don't deserve a girl like Donna for six dollars!
Hyde: I'm not trying to get Donna!
Jackie: Good, 'cause you won't for six dollars.

Hyde: Mrs. Pinciotti? Look, I was thinking about getting a present for... this girl. And, um, you know, she's about Donna's age, so I was kind of wondering what Donna likes?
Midge: Perfume. Donna wears White Shoulders. It's not just for shoulders; you can wear it anywhere!
Hyde: Really.
Midge: Sure! Like your neck... or the mall.

(waiting for Eric and wondering where he is)
Kelso: Maybe we should check the school morgue.
Hyde: Kelso, the school doesn't have a morgue.
Kelso: Then what do we pay all those taxes for?
Hyde: You know what kills me? You do better in school than I do.

Kelso: I don't see why you can't just serve us our food, Frank. We are paying customers, you know?
Frank: Hey, I did not lose a leg in Vietnam so that I could serve hot dogs to teenagers.
Kelso: You have both your legs, Frank.
Frank: Like I said, I did not lose a leg in Vietnam.

Eric: Are you gay?!
Buddy: No, I'm not gay!
Eric: But you just kissed me!
Buddy: ...Okay, I'm gay.

My God, with a car like that, you must be knee-deep in whores.


(asking why Buddy thinks he's gay)
Eric: Well, why would you think that?
Buddy: Cause we've been spending so much time together...
Eric: Because we're friends! I'm... I've been friends with Hyde for years and I never put the moves on him.

Kelso: I miss Eric.
Jackie: Well, you still have me.
Kelso: It's not the same Jackie! I can talk to Eric about things thatthat I can't talk about with you.
Jackie: Ok, well like what.
Kelso: Well, for instance, the annoying things that you do.

Donna: Where's Buddy?
Eric: Oh, Buddy! Um. Well, Buddy got busy, so...
Jackie: I mean, I'm sure he has a lot to do. He is "popular."
Fez: Yes and so obviously gay!
Jackie: Buddy is not gay!
Kelso: Please, Fez. That's just stupid! If Buddy was gay he would have been all over me!

Hyde: So, Forman? Now that the scary kids are gone, is Buddy gay?
Eric: Well, I don't think it's really my place to...
Hyde and Donna: He's gay.

Fez: Goodbye, Eric, I am going home now.
Eric: No, Fez! You haven't met grandma!
Fez: Oh, hello, grandma! (He sees her feet) Oh! In my village we worship feet. And these dogs are a holy treasure.

That 70's Show Quotes

Eric: If my dad catches me copping beers he'll kill me.
Hyde: I'm willing to take that risk.

Kitty: Well, the kids are off. I wonder where they went.
Red: Out of town.
Kitty: How do you know?
Red: I told them not to.