Penny: Okay let's try this. Think of yourself as one of those limited edition toys people like to collect.
Sheldon: I already do.

Penny: Come on, looks don't matter to Sheldon. [pause] Because he only has eyes for you!
Amy: Nice try.
Penny: Thanks, I was scrambling.

Raj: What just happened?
Howard: A stranger just lured Sheldon away with a candy bar.

It's so strange. Earlier today, I ended a sentence with a preposition, and you weren't there to correct my grammar.

Amy

Sheldon: Alright then, let's go to the bedroom, remove our clothes, fold them neatly, and engage in frenzied lovemaking.
Amy: What if we don't fold our clothes at all.
Sheldon: Or... what if we fold them?

I made your favorite oatmeal. Plain.

Amy

Penny: Oh come on, he's a grown man. He can take care of himself.
Amy: You really believe that?

Penny: Champagne, champagne, and for the world's tallest second grader, apple juice.
Sheldon: No bendy straw. Some party.

Howard: Have you ever tried to juggle?
Bernadette: Yes, I'm juggling my love for you and my embarrassment of you right now.

Physicist, baker, lover. What can't I do?

Sheldon

It's light, it's flakey, it's buttery. You don't need to have sex with him. Just eat one of these!

Raj

Penny: I didn't know you could drink while you were breastfeeding.
Bernadette: Yeah, they say the yeast in beer helps with milk production.
Amy: I'm pretty sure that's a myth. Let me check.
Bernadette: Ruin it for me, and I'll break this glass over your head.