The Conners
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCThe Conners Season 3 Episode 2: "Halloween and The Election vs. The Pandemic" Quotes
Wow, the pandemic, a presidential election, and Halloween all at once. Throw in five dumb teenagers and a cabin and you’ve got yourself a horror movie.
Dan
There’s a whole lot of stupid going around these days.
Dan
I wanted to say, "I’m not afraid. I’m wearing the mask to keep other people from getting sick, including you." Mom said that there’s no point in talking to idiots, so I should just ignore them.
Mark
Darlene: You can’t find Mary?
Dan: No, and DJ’s going to be mad if we lose her. When you’ve got one kid you get super attached to them.
Becky: But you had three kids, weren’t you attached to…
Dan: We had one favorite and two backups. You kids figure it out.
Jackie (as a witch): Don’t forget this door. It’s a bathroom used by six people!
Towel puppet: I’m a towel that hasn’t been washed in years. Help me and use bleach!
DJ: Plenty of kids are latch-key kids.
Darlene: When we were kids, there was always somebody at home to watch us.
Dan: That’s because your mother and I loved you guys, and we couldn’t hold down a steady job.
Becky: I could have used a little less love and little more Calvin Klein jeans.
Darlene: You’re doing the right thing.
DJ: It doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.
Come on, I’m making hot chocolate. We’re finally going to try it with milk; you’ve always wanted to know what that tastes like.
Dan
Dan: Okay, there are people who are willfully ignorant, and you just can’t talk to them, but what about the rest who just don’t see it your way. I’ve got friends I disagree with. Do you?
Darlene: That’s not fair. I don’t have friends.
Darlene: You can’t engage anymore. Everyone just gets louder and louder and louder. That’s how Mark ended up in a fistfight.
Dan: Mark ended up in a fistfight because Colin’s father and Mark’s mother have both taught their kids that anybody who doesn’t agree with them is stupid.
Darlene: Hey, don’t you dare equate them with me.
Dan: Why? Because you think you’re right? They think they’re right. Then nobody talks. That’s the kind of mentality that’s ruining the country.
