I'm telling you, that baby could be the star of a show called "Babies I Don't Care About."

Deangelo

Michael: You show me a white man you trust, and I will show you a black man that I trust even more. Pam, tell me a white person you trust.
Pam: My dad.
Michael: Danny Glover.

Several weeks ago, Andy Bernard had an incident. But after five weeks in Anger Management, I'm back. And I've got a new attitude. And a new name. And... a bunch of new techniques for dealing with the grumpies.

Andy

Dwight: I have a girlfriend.
Jim: Sure you do.

Hey man, can I get a plus five? And it's all guys.

Ryan [to Danny]

Every Halloween I tell him the same thing; you can't bring weapons into the office, and every year he says the same thing; as soon as I get my weapons back I'm gonna kill you.

Toby

Why does the Sun rise in the morning? Why do magnets stick together? Because everybody says so. Everybody.

Michael

[to the kids] You ever seen a foot with four toes?

Creed

Packer: Yeah you know how to read a menu!
Kevin: He's right. I could lose some weight.

This chord has Creed written all over it.

Michael

We can't just sit around waiting for Creed to die.

Michael

You been with a blonde before? It's the big leagues.

Dwight [to Jim]

The Office Quotes

Pam: So I closed the door but the image of his...
Jim: Baquette.
Pam: ... dangling participle...
Jim: Eww.
Pam: ... still burned in my eyes.
Jim: I can imagine.

Mike gave me a list of his top ten Springsteen songs. Three of them were Huey Lewis and the News. One was Tracy Chapman, Fast Car. And my personal favorite, Short People.

Darryl