Oscar: You know what we haven't done in a while? Happy hour... Upstairs, the warehouse, everybody just going out for a drink.
Darryl: Has that ever happened?... ever?
Oscar: Didn't we? I think we did.
Darryl: You want me to invite Matt?
Oscar: Yeah, the, uh the whole gang. Matt included.
Darryl: Look just be straight with me man. You can be gay with Matt just, be straight with me.

Yeah! I love going to the bars with Bob. I wear a tend to wear something low cut, get men to flirt with me... And Bob beats them up ... What?

Phyllis

I gotta tell you this baby is amazing... She ... gets me out of everything... And I... and I love her. I also love her very much.

Jim

Andy: Erin! I need you to fax this and get me a confirmation prompto. Are you going later?
Erin: Sure, if you are.
Andy: Yes!
Erin: Talk to me like that again and I'll cut your face off.
Andy: Whoa!

Andy: Hey Boss Man, bunch of us are going to get some drinks, you in?
Michael: [pauses] Ladies and gentlemen it is quitting time!
Andy: I'm sorry I meant later.
Michael: Okay. Yes.
Andy: For happy hour?
Michael: Sure, no, I got that.

So, the guy shows me the deck he's built. And I'm like, I'll call this a deck if it'll make you happy, but this is just a porch without a roof.

Darryl

Andy: Wow. Can you imagine what people would say if they saw us dancing together.
Erin: Oh I know.
Andy: They'd be like, "What's up with those twoo!"
Erin: "Hey guys get a bedroom already!"
Andy: "Did we miss the wedding!"
Erin: [laughs]
Andy: Um I got it! I'll do this, and you play the racing game and then we'll switch.
Erin: [pause] Yes. Okay. Yeah that's smart.
Andy: No drama, okay.

Angela versus Isabelle. Height, advantage Isabelle. Birthing hips, advantage Isabelle. Remaining childbearing years, advantage Isabelle. Legal obligation, advantage Angela.

Dwight

I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk. And I learn. I absorb information, from the strategies of winners. And the losers! Actually I probably learn more from the losers.

Michael

Woman: I am an ESL teacher.
Michael: Really? See, I didn't think you could teach that. I thought that was something you were born with. What am I thinking right now.
Woman: Are you thinking I said ESP?
Michael: Yes. Ah I feel like an idiot. Awesome.

Jim: Do you wanna just make a run for it?
Pam: Maybe.
Kevin: [walks by, starts screaming into Pam's chest] Wahhhhhhhh! Wahhhhh! Mammyyyyy!
Jim: What is happening?

Hi I'm Date Mike. Nice to meet me. How do you like your eggs in the morning.

Michael

The Office Season 6 Episode 20 Quotes

Pam: Kevin!
Kevin: [hugs her] Ahhhhhhh!
Pam: Yay! How are you!
Kevin: Oh I missed you so much!
Pam Beesly: Aww!
Kevin: Yeahhhhhh! Wahhhhhh! Wahhhhhhhhhh! Wahhhhhhhhh!
[cut to interview]
Kevin: Well when a new mom hears a baby cry, her you-know-whats fill up with you-know-what? And then her shirt gets... you know ... That would be funny!

Michael: Oh, wow. I cannot believe this is happening. It's everything I dreamed. Oh my God!
Jim: Easy.
Michael: It's not a birthday, it's not a good-bye party ...
Jim: Oh hey, Pam and I are gonna go play pool with one of her friends. And we need a fourth.
Michael: Sucks to be youuuu!
Jim: [pause] Would you like to be our fourth.
Michael: That would be sublime.