Andy: Why did we pretend like we worked here?
Dwight: Is that what we were doing?

You know what you guys should do? Go to the book store at lunch. There's tons of cuties and it's easy to talk to them. "Hey what book is that? Cool let's hang out tonight. Sex already? Whoa."


Dwight: My resolution is: meet a loose woman

I'm really excited for Michael either way, because if Holly chooses to be with him, he will be so, so happy. And if not, he'll be avoiding the biggest mistake of his life.


Erin: Gummy bears and gummy worms?
Michael: Bears sad, worms happy... come on, Erin.

Wow, did your baby draw that?

Dwight [to Pam]

If she's engaged, I'm going to go crazy, and I'm going to start attacking people. If she's not engaged, in all honesty, I might just burn this whole place down to the ground out of happiness. Either way I am going to need some talking down, and nobody talks me down like myself in a video talking me down.


What are you gonna do now? You gonna make fun of our leader's weird voice? [mumbles] Over the line, Jim.


In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at's fear. Merry Christmas.


Robert seems great. He's very handsome, firm handshake, he's gay, good sense of humor.


I have been trying to get on jury duty every year since I was 18 years old. To get to go sit in an air conditioned room, downtown, judging people, while my lunch is paid for...that is the life.


Didn't think your affectionate nicknames would be your undoing, did you Jim?


The Office Season 7 Quotes

Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, 10 fingers, two nipples, a butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I have just described to you the Lochness Monster, and the reward for its capture...all the riches in Scotland. So I have one question, why are you her


Yes, I have a dream... I want to own a decommissioned lighthouse. And I want to live at the top. And nobody knows I live there. And there's a button I can press and launch that lighthouse into space.