The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXThe Simpsons Season 21 Episode 9: "Thursdays with Abie" Quotes
Grandpa: Why don't we let Homer tell the story.
Homer: Really, me? You mean it?
Grandpa: I think you're ready for your first ramble.
Homer: I've been waiting for this day for so long. The year is 1946, and in a world torn, a single flower blooms and that flower is an angry Japanese monster named Godzilla. How am I doing dad?
Grandpa: I'm hanging on every word.
Clouds are God's sneezes.
Ralph
Give Larry my number. I can teach him things. Useful things.
Agnes
Grandpa: Look at that, they re-created the thirties: tent cities, failing banks.
Marshall: Nope, those are real.
Lisa: Chief, my brother fell in the storm drain!
Chief Wiggum: I'm strictly an above the ground policeman, what you need is the sewer cops.
Lisa: Fine, what's the number?
Chief Wiggum: Lisa, you're old enough now that I can tell you the truth. There's no such thing as sewer cops. It's just something we tell the kids to feel safe.
Lisa: What about Bart?
Chief Wiggum: Well if you miss him, you can yell into a toilet.
Grandpa: That's how I got my idea for a suitcase with wheels: from a commercial for a suitcase with wheels.
You're in the newspaper business? Something that's going to die before I do.
Grandpa
Lisa: Slimu looks kind of uncomfortable.
Homer: Wouldn't you if you were a salt water fish in a fresh water aquarium?
Oh, I love going to aquatic parks. Sure they have less rides than amusement parks, less fish than the aquariums, but the parking is ample.
Homer
