That's great honey, if you were a boy you'd be a scientist.

Homer

• Permalink: That's great honey, if you were a boy you'd be a scientist.
• Added: March 07, 2011

Grampa: The television only has one channel.
Aide: That's a fish tank!
Grampa: You're a fish tank.
Aide: That was hurtful. I wish I was a fish tank, then I could filter out his nasty words.

• Permalink: The television only has one channel. That's a fish tank! You...
• Added: March 07, 2011

Nelson: Did you find any gold?
Bart: Even better, the prospectors left naughty French postcards.
Nelson: Bart, this is fool's porn, I'll take it off your hands.

• Permalink: Did you find any gold? Even better, the prospectors left naugh...
• Added: March 07, 2011

Chalmers: I recall you took a sick day of which you had none.
Skinner: I was gonna lose my foot...
Chalmers: Of which you have two.

• Permalink: I recall you took a sick day of which you had none. I was gonn...
• Added: March 07, 2011

Hey this is one of the planets in Star Wars.

Otto [upon arriving at desert]

• Permalink: Hey this is one of the planets in Star Wars.
• Added: March 07, 2011

According to this live blog, Ben Stiller and Jack Black are doing a bit that will not end.

Marge

• Permalink: According to this live blog, Ben Stiller and Jack Black are doin...
• Added: February 21, 2011

I was born a rolling 80's, I'll die a rolling 80's.

Homer

• Permalink: I was born a rolling 80's, I'll die a rolling 80's.
• Added: February 21, 2011

Red Carpet Interviewer: And Lisa, who are you wearing?
Lisa: I believe it's from Lamps Plus.

• Permalink: And Lisa, who are you wearing? I believe it's from Lamps Plus.
• Added: February 21, 2011

And I'd like to thank the women who's been inspiring me for the last 25 years... the cute one from The Bangles.

Homer

• Permalink: And I'd like to thank the women who's been inspiring me for the ...
• Added: February 21, 2011

Don't feel bad boy. Everyone makes mistakes. Yours is just public and expensive.

Homer

• Permalink: Don't feel bad boy. Everyone makes mistakes. Yours is just pub...
• Added: February 21, 2011

Herman Millwood: Is Bart Simpson here? Because I'm about to make him and his family very wealthy
Homer: Wealthy? Remember the guy that drove you to school that one time?

• Permalink: Is Bart Simpson here? Because I'm about to make him and his fam...
• Added: February 21, 2011

Marge: You guys went gray yourselves.
Selma: No we didn't, this is just smoke and ash.

• Permalink: You guys went gray yourselves. No we didn't, this is just smok...
• Added: February 13, 2011