Daniel: Maybe it wouldn't kill us to try and work together
Alexis: I'm up for it, as long as you stop staring at my boobs
Daniel: Actually I'm staring at your Adam's Apple, it's nice work

Hilda: So you really don't care how I dress?
Justin: Well I'm not crazy about the animal prints and you're a little over accessorized. You have your own style, it's cool.

Bobby's Mom: your a mother, why don't you try looking like it
Hilda: You're a woman, why don't you try looking like that
Justin: Snap!

Random Girl: The witch is gone, we can finally have cake
Wilhelmina [over computer]: It was for your own good you dump truck

Birthdays are the gateway to Secret Santas and Casual Fridays

Wilhelmina

something tells me he's not going to knock someone up on his prom night

Santos

Claire: How are [Alexis and Daniel]?
Betty: They're adjusting...
Claire: Betty..
Betty: It's like Cain and Abel.. if Abel was a woman... who used to be a man

[Claire is looking at picture on Betty's cell phone]
Claire: It's a guy with no chin and permanent bed head
Betty: Oh that's Walter

I didn't pass out in a Mexican whore house again did I?

Claire

Wilhelmina: who the hell are yo??
Evelyn: I'm Evelyn, your cleaning lady for thirteen years. It's nice to meet you
Wilhelmina: Nice to put a face with the burrito wrapper you left on my counter

Betty: Let's take the stairs, it'll get the toxins out
Claire: I like my toxins.. with two olives

Claire: Who are you?
Betty: I'm Betty Suarez, I'm Daniel's assistant
Claire: I'm Claire Meade, Daniel's mother, I win

Ugly Betty Season 1 Episode 15 Quotes

Wilhelmina: These gold pumps will not step foot in this building until I rule this magazine
Alexis: She's melodramatic isn't she?
Marc: Don't you love it?

Alexis: And no i didn't quit smoking, it's a hormone patch so the mustache doesn't grow back
Betty: Where'd you get that because I have to bleach all the time?