Feel like getting a disgusting drink in a dirty IRA criminal bar?


Stop saying matey. You're supposed to be Irish, not a pirate.


Samantha: You know the goal of going undercover is being inconspicuous.
Leo: That's why I went balls out. No one questions the boss, guys. Also, you can't spell 'inconspicuous' without 'conspicuous.'

You could just ignore the issue. God knows it worked like a charm for my marriage. All three of them.


Shaw: I might as well take out a full page ad in the International Herald saying 'Carlton Shaw, Career Spy: Kill me now.'

Samantha: You're hot.
Hoyt: Wow.
Samantha: What do you see?
Hoyt: No, it's just not often I hear those words from a woman. I kinda wanna enjoy it for a second.

Steven: Look at this new tranquilizer gun. Invisible laser sight. You use glasses. You can see, but there's no red dot.
Samantha: Is it 4G?

Ok, what the hell was that? Who are you, Catwoman?


Steven: Are you kidding me with that?
Hoyt: What, the PJs? Feels like I'm totally naked. This thing is 96% silk.
Steven: And 4% Lady Gaga

Bingo! Ernesto Santos. His first name isn't actually Bingo, just Ernesto.


I will always defend your French Toasts. That's what husbands do.


I'll be frank. Coming here, asking you to fly to an exotic locale hoping that your rusty espionage skills will be sufficient
enough to do the job pains me. Deeply. In the groin.


Undercovers Quotes

Allow me to unstick you.


You know me, as cool as the other side of the pillow.