Why am I paying these people? They should be paying me for therapy.

Lisa

If I never would have done all of that douchebagging, I wouldn't be who I am today.

Jax

When it comes to this group, I can predict the future like Gandhi. Did Gandhi predict the future? Who is Gandhi?

Jax

What happened between 6 and midnight? My guess is Stassi Schroeder and probably some tequila.

Scheana

When I think back to my relationship with Stassi, I'm kind of reminded of that movie Misery.

Jax

Scheana apologizing to Lala is like the victims apologizing to Charles Manson.

Stassi

I am ride or fucking die with those goat cheese balls. And my white wine.

Stassi