What happened between 6 and midnight? My guess is Stassi Schroeder and probably some tequila.

Scheana

When I think back to my relationship with Stassi, I'm kind of reminded of that movie Misery.

Jax

Scheana apologizing to Lala is like the victims apologizing to Charles Manson.

Stassi

I am ride or fucking die with those goat cheese balls. And my white wine.

Stassi

You've got more balls than us.

Jax

I'm overwhelmed with this emotion of just... pride.

Tom Sandoval

We do do to-go food, you know?

Lisa

I feel like that's a section conducive to winter bodies.

Stassi

If I could back in time, I would rather hook up with Ariana than Kristen. It's like night and day. Apples and oranges. I"m kidding, I would never do that to Tom. Again.

Jax

You can't do this job sober on gay pride.

Jax

Woman of America stop recording yourself having sex. It always gets out there. This is my PSA.

Stassi

Katie: Let's talk about how your dick doesn't work!
Schwartz: Whaaat? My dick works great.

Vanderpump Rules Quotes

You were my girlfriend, but you were also my enemy,

Tom [to Kristen]

I’ve never had a girl say ‘no’ to me before.

Jax