Will & Grace
Thursdays 9:00 PM on NBCWill & Grace Quotes
We're just friends, it doesn't matter what I look…Why is my head on Betsy DeVos’ neck?
Grace: It always amazes me how gay guys stay friends with all of their exes. I’m not friends with any of mine.
Jack: Grace, romance is different for us. A date between straight people sometimes leads to sex, and sex between gay people sometimes leads to a date.
Grace: Well put.
I know this is extreme, but we are not dealing with a normal person. She is not like us, she is a total whack-a-doo. Alright, here is a key to her apartment. I secretly made a copy 15 years ago and I keep it on me at all times in case Will ever goes missing and I need to search for his body. Remember, whack-a-doo.
Val: You mean you'd really go to lunch with me?
Karen: Well, sure. I mean you're nuttier than a tree full of squirrels but we do have the same blood type and that could come in handy.
Grace: I know what it is. There are people who throw themselves in front of expensive cars trying to get money out of rich people.
Jack: I heard the same thing on FOX news so you know it's a true fact.
Larry: I'm in love with Will and I want to shout it from a mountain top.
Grace: Or bury it deep inside you and just cry in the shower like a normal person.
Despite that his only office skills are crying and scrapping booking, it's nice having Larry here.
Jack: You sure we can't take you to the hospital? It's the least we can do.
Karen: Actually, not running her over would have been the least we could do.
Jack: That songs been stuck in my head for days.
Will: Well, sing something different.
Jack: You don't think I didn't think of that! That thing swats away other songs like Lindsay Lohan swats away second chances.
Will: We could still go out. It's early.
Grace: Oh no, once I've taken my bra off it's all over. No way I'm strapping that thing back on again.
Jack: This says pepperoni pizza but there's no pepperoni on it, just crop circles with cheese.
Grace: It came that way!
Will: I'm done complaining that things used to be better. They weren't. I know they're not great now but we do have a lot to be thankful for.
Grace: We should have faith that it will get better.
Jack: The arc of history is long but it always bends towards justice.
Will: I'm guessing you dated a guy named Justice?
Jack: And we called my penis the arc of history.
