Wynonna: So you can't take Peacemaker. That's good to know. Tell you what: when I break this game, I'll shove her up your ass and blow your guts out through your brains. Willingly.

Wynonna: The floor is melting, Doc! I'm out!
Doc: Wynonna, do not do anything foolish!

Jeweler: How did you say you came upon this ring?
Nicole: Uh, it's been in my family for generations. Yeah. It came right over on the boat, smuggled right up Granny Haught's petticoats.

Wynonna: Bulshar wants The Tower.
Waverly: Well, that's obviously a wang metaphor.
Wynonna: Kate says that represents darkness and destruction.
Waverly: Yeah, like I said, Bulshar's wang.

Wynonna: Then my will is a stone-cold, be-mulleted iron woman. On steroids.
Kate: Girl, I'm a mystic and I still can't decode that sentence.

Wynonna: It'd be awesome if Bulshar's cards just said: "Hey, Bulshar, you're a big old bag of deflated dicks."

Still smells like Bobo del Shit down here!

Doc

Woman, can't I have one goddamn dinner party without you getting all up in my biscuits?

Waverly

He was glamoured, so he thinks he was bitten by a Caucasian tree rodent.

Jeremy

Dammit. That is a bigger tiny sword.

Jeremy: It's just a super-cazh BGD.
Robin: BGD?
Jeremy: Big gay dinner.

That’s exactly how my first Grindr date ended. …I’ve said too much.

Jeremy