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Then I feel sorry for you. I think you need help.

Marcus: I don’t really know where to start.

Phoebe: Whatever it is, just tell me. It can’t be that bad.

Marcus: I’m a vampire.

Phoebe: Come on, Marcus.

Marcus: Phoebe, seriously. I’m hundreds of years old. You catalog history; I’ve lived it. I know it sounds crazy, but humans share this planet with other creatures — vampires, witches, and daemons who hide in plain sight and are all around you. Creatures like me.

Phoebe: So, you’re not a superhero, just an actual vampire. Funny because I didn’t see a coffin in your apartment.

Marcus: Everything you think you know about it is human propaganda based on half truths, passed down and distorted through millennia, but we are real. We are everywhere.

Phoebe: You seriously believe this.

Marcus: I swear, I’m telling the truth.

Phoebe: Then I feel sorry for you. I think you need help.