Instructor: Welcome to the Quahog maritime school Chris. Our curriculum consists of being on boats for long periods of time with men, just men, for many days at a time. Up on the deck with lots of men, or down in the galley with lots of men.
Chris: Is this some kind of pirate school?
Instructor: Well... a certain kind of pirate. Yes, we've been called that.
Chris: I don't know...
Stewie: Is there some kind of pre-school program?


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Characters:
Chris Griffin, Stewie Griffin
Episode:
Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16: "No Chris Left Behind"
Show:
Family Guy
Related Quotes:
Chris Griffin Quotes, Stewie Griffin Quotes, Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16 Quotes, Family Guy Quotes
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Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16 Quotes

Peter: Chris, I would give you a hug, but I'm exhausted for working two jobs for paying your scholarship. I've been selling buttscratchers-BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows Lois a tiny hand on a stick )
Lois: No, Peter.
Peter: BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows buttscratcher to Lois again )
Lois: Peter, no!
Peter: BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows buttscratcher to Lois once again )
Lois: NO!
Peter: ( sad ) Buttscratcher...

Lois: Meg and I have been working at nights.
(scene cuts to Meg and Lois in an alley dressed as hookers. Car pulls over)
Man: I'll take the one in the right.
Lois: (opens the car's door ) Well, once again, Meg, I'll be back in an hour.