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Rating: 4.5 / 5.0 (12 Votes)
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Recap

Archer, Ray, and Lana are on a mission to the Alps. They are to infiltrate a mountain climbing expedition where one of their follow climbers is a foreign terrorist.

Lana is mad at Archer because he left the dossier at home on the person they're supposed to assassinate. Archer can only remember that the target is someone from a country who was an Axis power in World War II. Archer is also in a bitter mood because Ray forgot the gum (Spoiler alert: He had the gum all along).

They arrive at the lodge to find that their climbing expedition consists of an Italian, a German, and a Japanese which doesn't make their job any easier. The guide is a slightly bombastic Irish-Canadian named Crash McCracken who Archer wastes no time making a bad impression on by getting drunk and belittling his mountain climbing skills.

Archer continues to irk Crash the next day by not taking the life-threatening sport serious. Meanwhile, Ray and Lana are both crushing on Crash McCaren pretty hard.

Lana tries to remedy the situation by calling Mallory but it turns out to be an elaborate voice mail hoax. She then tries to reach the gang back at headquarters but they're too busy lounging around enjoying margaritas in their new Japanese bath to get anything done. Nonetheless, they get out of the tub and aimlessly wander around a bit.

In the interim, the climbing expedition starts to hit some snags as the Japanese climber falls into a crevice and Crash is unable to rescue her.

Later an ice storm approaches, and everyone has to get into a tent and rub themselves all over (or something like that) each other for body heat. Naturally, Lana and Ray want to get in Crash's tent because of that aforementioned factoid that they find him superhot. Crash insists on camping out with the two foreigners, so Lana, Ray and Archer have to spend an uncomfortable night next to each other naked for body heat with Ray in the middle. It is here that Archer reveals that if he would ever have a gay experience it would be with a black man. 

In the morning, they  wake up to find the two climbers not named Crash McCaren dead. They also learn that Crash was the bad guy all along. Crash takes Lana prisoner but Archer remedies her by setting off an avalanche leaving everyone involved with serious injuries.

 

 

 

 

 

Show:
Archer
Season:
Episode Number:
3

Archer Season 6 Episode 3 Quotes

Cheryl: What the stupid shit are you doing??
Cyril: You said you wanted watermelon.
Cheryl: Watermelon's red?
Cyril: Yes. How do you not know that?
Cheryl: Who am I? Charles Frederick Andress?

Crash: I'm your guide, Crash McCarren. Um, I thought there were three of you.
Archer: One of us is weeping in the car.