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Rating: 3.8 / 5.0 (10 Votes)
Review Quotes


Holly is attempting to refill a water jug with the water fountain. When they look up, Milt is getting artwork delivered.

When the commander says to check to see if Milt is busy before going to a murder scene, Russ does just that – and leaves. When they get to the scene, Milt finds them. 

Surprisingly, Milt and Russ rub each other the wrong way. Russ wants to know why Milt was sent there and until he knows, he won't trust him. 

They head into the morgue. It's run by a little person who spent $12k to have the entire morgue retrofitted to her height. Naturally, Russ isn't her biggest fan.

Font is getting prescription marijuana for his migraines. Holly is worried that means Russ has to notify the wife of the victim's death. All over town, the force is learning there is a maple syrup cartel. Everyone points their fingers to Julio MacFarland, the leader of the cartel.

When Milt catches up with a local judge, he shares a funny story about Justice Scalia. Russ can't help but stop in his tracks and rub his head in disbelief. It's all going swimmingly until the judge heard the name MacFarland and turns down the warrant. That tickles Russ no end.

When they tail MacFarland, he decides to go see what he can see from where he can see it and then he'll figure out how he can see it from back in their car. You just knew there were going to be dogs inside the fence.

Russ wants to set up a sting operation. That's what they'd do if it was meth. He wants to get a bottle of Log Cabin and then deliver water. They cannot believe they're talking about maple syrup, but they're also talking about a dead man. Suddenly Russ and Milt are in the maple syrup business.

Breaking Bad via the syrup industry is pretty funny stuff. 

Meanwhile, Font wants to arrest the medical marijuana guy because he thinks he's been stiffed. 

The victim's wife visits Holly with insurance paperwork. When she wants his wedding ring to keep close to her heart, my hackles are raised.

The medical marijuana guy throws Font for a loop by suspecting his chain of custody. He says Font smoked it and took a fake sample to be tested and dares him to say differently.

Meanwhile, Milt and Russ are at dinner where Milt is wearing glasses and a baby blue sweater. He's telling Russ to seek therapy for his trust issues because he doesn't owe Russ anything. They're using undercover, selling high sugar uncut maple syrup. Outside, under the cover of darkness, a man unrolls a crepe and stuffs it inside a vial of syrup. 

As Russ is rolling syrup off of the truck, the syrup Yakuza comes in shooting. They'll get the warrant now.

Judge Walters apparently tipped off MacFarland as soon as the warrant was issued. That's an interesting twist.

After Russ has a chat with MacFarland's goon, he's suspended. In the next scene, the team stands up for Russ before falling apart and then attempting to take the lead for themselves.

Eddie's wife then steps in to cry in front of Holly, this time with her husband's ring around her neck. She's hoping to get his body returned. Suddenly Holly is knocking on Russ' door saying she screwed. She says the wife cried right through her foundation. She applied concealer with a yellow base. She's trying to offset blue, covering up a bruise. 

Holly knows the makeup was on the right side of her face and she's expecting the bruise pattern will match the ring pattern, which is very specific. She has the ring. Russ will try to make it right, but Holly wants him to trust Milt.

Russ goes to Milt, tells him what he knows. Milt hires him for a dollar. They confront her and as she is cornered, her father comes in. He confesses. Russ wants to let his confession ride while Milt wants to get to the bottom of it. The Commander likes the idea a father wants to go to prison to protect his daughter. Milt is confused. Russ tells him she cares about the truth, but more about justice.

Milt helps Font with the marijuana man by getting Milt involved as he shows the FBI warning at the beginning of Up in Smoke.


Battle Creek
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Battle Creek Season 1 Episode 2 Quotes

Look at that. Milt gets original art and we get counterfeit water.


Milt: Why you smilin'?
Russ: Am I? I'm just wondering if this is the first time you've ever been turned down for something.
Milt: You do realize my failing to get that warrant affects you, too.
Russ: Oh, no. I'm upset about it. But I'm a complex person, capable of many emotions.