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Rating: 3.0 / 5.0 (61 Votes)
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Recap

Mary Alice kicks off the season premiere with a recap of the lies and scandal that have hit the lane in the last few years.  She narrates the lives and ordeals of her neighbors, friends, and herself.  We are reminded of the threatening letter sent to her that caused her to end her life.  Her husband Paul, commits murder to end the life of the woman who threatened Mary Alice, and then Felicia Tillman frames Paul for her own murder to get back at him for killing her sister. 

Paul, who just spent ten years in jail, was freed when the authorities found that Felicia was indeed alive.  That brings Paul back to Wisteria Land. Revenge is on his mind, and the neighbors are concerned about his arrival.

Bree confesses to Gaby that her son Andrew was the one who hit Carlos’ mother.  Gaby is shocked, and wishes Bree did not tell her this, as she now will have to tell Carlos. 

Bree watches as Orsen packs up to leave her, due to her lies.  She later finds out he is seeing his physical therapist, and is numb from this news.  She attempts to spend time figuring out what to do next, but ends up ripping all of the wallpaper down in her living room to busy herself with a project.  Her new handyman, played by Brian Austin Greene will surely help her fix it. 

Renee Perry, played by Vanessa Williams, is a college friend of Lynette’s.  She comes for a visit, and after taking a look around at Lynette’s life, offends her by implying that Lynette was not successful.  Lynette confronts her, and Renee confesses that her rich Yankee playing husband is leaving her after she caught him cheating.  They make up, and get their friendship back on track.

Susan and Mike move into their new money saving apartment – and financial troubles continue to torment.  Susan is trying to sell her gaudy homemade jewelry to make money, and Mike suggests taking a job on an oil rig in Alaska to support them.  Susan, desperate to keep Mike home, takes on a gig as lingerie clad maid, without Mike knowing, to help bring in extra cash.

Gaby knows Bree’s secret and keeps it from Carlos.  Carlos on the other hand, was notified by the hospital that Juanita, their daughter may have been switched at birth eight years ago.  He decides to keep this from Gaby and threatens the hospital to hide the news and stop the investigation.    

Show:
Desperate Housewives
Season:
Episode Number:
1
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Desperate Housewives Season 7 Episode 1 Quotes

If you field this one, I'll tell him where babies come from.

Mike

Thank you for sending my husband to prison, Bree. Nice work!

Gaby