"Meet The Quagmires"

Death grants Peter's wish to go back to 1984, when he was 18, for one night. Peter stands up Lois on a date and ends up going out with an actress.

"It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One"

Lois runs for mayor of Quahog and dumbs down her political views to win. Once inside office, Peter enjoys the perks that come with being the "first lady" of Quahog.

"No Chris Left Behind"

After Chris is expelled from school, he's sent to the same boarding school Carter attended. Meanwhile, the Chicken returns to Quahog to fight Peter.

"Boys Do Cry"

Lois gets a job as the Church organist and the family starts going to Church again. After getting sick at communion, the Church assumes Stewie is the devil and they chase him to Texas.

"No Meals On Wheels"

The Griffins open their own restaurant, but when it fails to attract customers, Joe offers to bring his friends by.

"Bill and Peter's Bogus Journey"

Peter helps Bill Clinton fix his flat tire and soon the two become best friends. Meanwhile, Lois and Stewie try to potty-train Brian.

"Airport '07"

When Peter has to drive Quagmire to work, he gets the poor guy fired. Quagmire gets some advice from his mentor, Hugh Hefner.

"The Tan Aquatic with Steve Zissou"

When a bully picks on Chris, he goes to Peter for help, who ends up beating the kid senseless. Meanwhile, when Stewie goes out without sunscreen and accidentally gets a tan, he becomes obsessed with tanning.

"Peter's Two Dads"

After Peter's father, Francis dies, Thelma tells Peter that his real father is in Ireland. Meanwhile, Lois spanks Stewie when he misbehaves.

"Road to Rupert"

Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale and has to take an upset Stewie cross-country to Colorado to find the stuffed animal. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license and forces Meg to drive him around.

Family Guy Quotes

Aunt Margarite [on her video will]: Lois, you were always my favorite niece; I just knew you would find a wonderful man who would make all your dreams come true. But I was wrong.
Peter: And now you're dead. Score one for Peter

But now that you mention it, your face looks like a used condom.

Quagmire