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Peter's Day In Bed
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 12
"Valentine's Day in Quahog"
Original Air Date:

The town of Quahog gets caught up in romance-themed hijinks when Valentine's Day rolls around.

Peter's New Lover?
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 11
"The Giggity Wife"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Quagmire accidentally marries a prostitute and then pretends to be Peter's lover to try and get out of it.

Brian's Big Night
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 10
"Brian's Play"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Brian writes a hit play, but when he finds out that Stewie wrote something even better, issues arise between them as they try to bring each other down.

The Griffins in Space
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 9
"Space Cadet"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Chris goes to space camp to prove he's not an idiot, and he must save the day when the Griffins wind up in orbit.

Peter's Christmas Story
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 8
"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, while the Griffins decorate for Christmas, Peter tells his version of the Nativity story.

Meg Likes Kent
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 7
"Friends Without Benefits"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Meg has a crush on a guy at her school, but when he turns out to be gay, she tries to set him up with his real interest: Chris.

Lois' Birthday
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 6
"Lois Comes Out of Her Shell"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Lois experiences a mid-life crisis when she tries to celebrate her latest birthday.

Tracking Down Joe's Shooter
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 5
"Joe's Revenge"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, the man who crippled Joe is on the loose, and it's up to him, Quagmire, and Peter to stop him.

Brian Travels Back in Time
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 4
"Yug Ylimaf"
Original Air Date:

On the 200th episode of Family Guy, Brian and Stewie experience time flowing backwards, and they must fix it before Stewie is unbirthed.

Stewie & Brian Are Spies
Watch Family Guy Season 11 Episode 3
"The Old Man and the Big 'C'"
Original Air Date:

On Family Guy, Brian and Stewie discover that Carter Pewterschmidt has suddenly cured himself of cancer with a secret formula he's hiding from the world.

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Family Guy Quotes

Stewie: Alright Brian, I'm gonna go up to the upper level and run this wire down through the wall. Grab your walkie, I'll call you when I get up there.
Brian: Okay.
(Stewie walks away, is heard over the walkie-talkie)
Stewie: Brian, pick up. Over.
Brian: What?
Stewie: Brian, please say "over" when you are finished talking. Over.
Brian: (sighs) What? Over.
Stewie: Do you see the wire yet? Over.
Brian: No.
Stewie: Nooooo what? Over.
Brian: No. Over.
Stewie: Okay, I'm gonna start feeding it through. Over.
Brian: Wait, If you haven't started feeding it, why'd ya ask me if I could see it?
Stewie: Didn't copy that. Over.
Brian: I said why did ya ask me if I could see it if you haven't started feeding it. Over.
Stewie: Oh that's better, I can hear you now. Over. Do you see it yet? Over.
Brian: You know, you're a jackass. For the record, I don't wanna hang out with you anymore when this is over.
Stewie: When this is what Brian? Over.
Brian: I said, I don't wanna hang out with you anymore when this is over.
Stewie: When this is what? You've got to finish your sentence. Over.
Brian: That's it, my sentence is over.
Stewie: Your sentence is what, Brian? Over.
Brian: My sentence is- wait a minute. I have to say over, even if the sentence ends with the word over?
Stewie: Ends with the word what, Brian? Over.
(the wire descends through the wall)
Brian: Oh, I see the wire.
Stewie: You see the wire what? Over.
Brian: Over! (yanks on the wire, pulling Stewie down with it)

Brian: You know, Connie, I think I have a theory about why you're such a bitch.
Connie: Excuse me?
Meg: Brian, let's just go.
Brian: No, no, no, no, no. Now hang on... hang on, Meg, hang on. You see, Connie, you're popular because you developed early and started putting out when you were 12. But now you can't stand to look at yourself in the mirror because all you see is a whore. So, you pick on Meg to avoid the inevitable realization that once your body's used up by age 19, you're going to be a worn-out, chalky-skinned burlap sack that even your step-dad won't want. How's that? Am I in the ballpark?
(Connie cries and runs)