Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 19
"Golly Moses, She's A Muffin"
Original Air Date:

Charlie is surprised to find out that Kandi has been living with Alan in his house for the past three weeks. Alan is having trouble getting Kandi a job and Charlie is going through a dry spell.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 18
"The Spit-Covered Cobbler"
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Alan is having financial troubles trying to pay Judith's alimony and his girlfriend Kandi's bills. Charlie tries to convince him to dump Kandi.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 17
"The Unfortunate Little Schnauser"
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When Charlie is nominated for a jingle award, he refuses to go since his rival always wins. His family manages to convince him to go. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie with her boyfriend problems.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 16
"Ergo, The Booty Call"
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Alan tries to decide whether he should bring his younger girlfriend, Kandi, to Jake's birthday party where she'd meet Judith. Meanwhile, Rose tries to get her boyfriend to dress and act more like Charlie.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 15
"My Tongue is Meat"
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When Mia tries to make Charlie healthier, he continues to sneak drinks, cigars and hamburgers behind her back. He needs to decide if he's in love or just whipped.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 14
" Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded"
Original Air Date:

Charlie continues to attempt to sleep with his girlfriend, Mia, when a sex-craved ex-girlfriend of his, Kandi shows up and complicates things. Alan ends up dating her.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 13
"Humiliation is a Visual Medium"
Original Air Date:

Charlie and Mia attempt to start a relationship that's not based on sex by not having any. Charlie makes an inappropriate suggestion involving other women.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 12
"That Special Tug"
Original Air Date:

When Alan becomes insecure over the fact Jake doesn't want to spend time with him, Charlie begins seeing a therapist.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 11
"Santa's Village of the Damned"
Original Air Date:

Alan starts dating a woman who has a Martha Stewart complex. Soon the woman has the whole house completely spotless.

Watch Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode 10
"Something Salted and Twisted"
Original Air Date:

Charlie tries to help Alan get over his obsession of trying to get the approval from the women in his life.

Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: Oh, try MalibuPuddingGirls.com.
Alan: Pudding Girls?
Charlie: Trust me.
Alan: Oh ... ew.

Charlie: For every gorgeous woman out there's a guy tired of banging her.
Alan: But that guy is never me.