Walden Meets a Girl
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 9
"A Fishbowl Full Of Glass Eyes"
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Is Walden ready to date again? He meets a beautiful British woman on this episode of Two and a Half Men.

Gary Busey on Two and a Half Men
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 8
"Frodo's Headshots"
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Alan ends up in a mental hospital on Two and a Half Men this week, as Gary Busey guest stars as himself.

The Two and a Half Men
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 7
"Thank You For The Intercourse"
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Walden's redecorates this week. But the move sends Alan over the edge on Two and a Half Men.

Jake Harper Photograph
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 6
"Those Fancy Japanese Toilets"
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Jake crushes on his teacher this week, but there's a problem: she crushes on Walden.

Surprise, Alan!
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 6
"The Squat and Hover"
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Walden receives divorce papers this week. He then meets a woman who resembles his ex.

Surprise, Alan!
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 5
"Giant Cat Holding Churro"
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Walden tries to cheer Alan up this week. How so? By throwing him a bikini party, of course.

Walden and Alan
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 4
"Nine Magic Fingers"
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Walden is on a mission this week. Where is Mrs. Right? She must be around somewhere!

Stunned Alan
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 3
"Big Girls Don't Throw Dog Food"
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Alan hangs out with Jake this week and realizes: his son isn't exactly so smart.

Cleaning Up Walden
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 2
"People Who Love Peepholes"
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It's the second half of the Two and a Half Mn season premiere event. We meet Walden's ex-wife this week.

Ashton Kutcher as Walden Schmidt
Watch Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 1
"Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt"
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Perhaps you've heard the news: Charlie Sheen is out and Ashton Kutcher is in. We meet the latter's character on this season premiere.

Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: Oh, try MalibuPuddingGirls.com.
Alan: Pudding Girls?
Charlie: Trust me.
Alan: Oh ... ew.

Charlie: For every gorgeous woman out there's a guy tired of banging her.
Alan: But that guy is never me.