Midge narrates — Midge walks Ethan to kindergarten through the park. Ethan stops to pet a Pomeranian, and the dog's owner is a handsome man.
On subsequent walks through the park, they meet him again and again. One day, he brings her a flower. They flirt mercilessly.
Susie stops the story as Dinah's niece and nephew run through the office. Dinah argues with a man on the phone and gets Susie to tell him she's at work. Susie returns to Midge.
Midge continues — Ethan had the day off, so Midge walked through the park alone. The handsome man showed up with a flower. They sat and talked for an hour while he talked about his interests.
Midge tried to give off the signals, but he never asked her out. She thought about asking him out but recollects a terrible experience as a teen on Sadie Hawkins day, and she was ready to ask her crush out.
Susie stops her from telling the Sadie Hawkins story and asks her to get back to the man-in-the-park story. Midge recounts the events of the morning — she met the handsome man, who was there without his dog, and he asked her out for coffee.
They went to his favorite coffee shop, but it was closed for renovations. He invited her back to his place because of his great espresso machine.
They went back to his place and had sex. Midge enjoyed the spontaneity of it.
Then, the man's wife got home. The coupled started yelling at each other, the Pomeranian was barking, and Midge snuck out, grabbing her coat and getting in the cab.
Susie asks why she's telling the story. Midge says she wants her lucky dress back.
Joel and Archie leave the club. Joel sends Archie to the bank with a large deposit. Archie is immediately robbed.
Abe buys some tobacco. Gitta is at the cigar shop. She threatens Abe, but he has no idea who she is or what she's talking about.
Molly is also at the cigar shop. She approaches Abe and starts discussing matchmaking. She lists his family members. Molly and Gitta tell Abe to tell Rose to stop. Abe makes a run for it.
Joel meets Midge for breakfast — he's grumpy and complains that she ordered for him. He tells her about the robbery, saying it will make money tight. Joel gives Midge some money and makes some suggestions for Halloween costumes for the kids.
Midge asks him what's going on. Joel tells her that he and Mei are having a baby. Midge wants to know more details, as it will affect her and the kids. She asks what will happen if Mei gets a job in another city. He says he can't move because of the club.
Joel gets up and leaves without finishing his breakfast. Midge pays, gets up, and follows Joel. She tells him he can't get mad for her asking questions, as she knows next to nothing about Mei.
Midge asks what he's going to tell Moishe and Shirley. Joel urges Midge not to tell them, saying they haven't even met her yet. Joel says he and Mei will work out the logistics when they get back — in the meantime, Midge should not say anything to anyone.
Abe gets home and locks the door. Quietly, he passes on the message from the matchmakers to Rose. He also recounts that, on his way home, to shake the matchmakers, he ducked into a Catholic church for sanctuary and accidentally took communion.
Abe shows Rose the wafer. She tells him to wrap it up and put it away. He says the matchmakers mentioned Miriam and the grandchildren by name.
Dinah, in tears, shows Miriam into Susie's office. Susie shares her good news — she got Midge a headlining gig at a thousand-seat theatre in Zagreb, Croatia.
It would involve getting many shots for diseases and traveling back and forth to Europe once a week for five weeks. Midge refuses to do it.
Susie says she was trying to get Midge a spot with Gordon Ford, but even Ford's booker's intern can't come to see her at an illegal strip club. Susie says she can't get Midge a headlining act right now.
Dinah, still in tears, tells Susie she's going to lunch. Susie tells Midge she's going to have to fire Dinah. Midge lets Susie know she's bringing four people with her to Alfie's showcase.
Midge asks why Susie isn't getting up. Susie confesses she is not wearing pants, but it was not a deliberate choice. Nicky answers the phone, telling Susie it's Sandy Bishop.
Susie takes the call, and Midge heads out, asking Frank and Nicky why they are there. They tell her they are helping out. They ask her about the Croatia gig, and she says she can't take it due to family. Frank notes this, saying she is part of their family.
Midge makes an offhand remark about how her family is growing. They think she's pregnant, and Midge explains that it's her ex-husband's mysterious girlfriend who's expecting.
Frank and Nicky ask if she wants them to do some digging on Mei, discretely, and she agrees.
Imogene visits Midge at the strip club and chats with the dancers. Imogene apologizes for Archie, saying he feels terrible. Midge says he put in an order for 57 pieces of Tupperware.
Gloria mentions that she has a lead on a gig for Midge, thanks to her dad — it's a luncheon for Jackie Kennedy, and they want a lady comedian. Gloria writes down the number. Midge asks how Gloria's dad is involved. Gloria explains that he's a senator.
Midge, her parents, Noah, and Astrid attend Alfie's show. The show begins. Alfie does some tricks with moving pictures in the spotlight. The audience applauds.
Later in the show, Alfie asks for a volunteer. Astrid is eager, but he says he prefers the reluctant. He chooses Rose. Rose joins Alfie on stage. He asks her name and provides her with a rose.
He asks her a few questions and then hypnotizes her using her grandchildren's names. Alfie asks Rose about her grandchildren and children. She says her son is a brilliant mathematician like his father and her daughter is a performer.
Alfie asks Rose to show him what her daughter does. Rose grabs the microphone and recreates Midge's set from the Wolford. Noah and Abe are aghast.
Midge apologizes to Noah just as Rose does a bit about his excessive masturbation as a teen. Rose then does a bit about how "her" mother is a huge flirt. Alfie pulls Rose out of her trance.
Rose is utterly oblivious to what happened and waves at her family in the audience. Alfie thanks the audience and disappears under a cape.
Midge grabs Rose and pulls her outside. Midge asks why Rose never told her she'd come to see her at the Wolford. Midge explains that Rose just recreated the set, and Rose admits she did attend. Rose asks what she said on stage.
Noah and Astrid storm out, arguing about their exes.
Rose says she had to come to see it because it was imperiling her business. Rose wants to know what she said in there.
Abe comes out, assuring Midge that he and Rose have sex more than every couple of months, and he's going to keep a log from now on.
Midge doesn't understand how her stand-up could affect Rose's business. Rose says it doesn't matter — they told her to stop, so she's going to stop.
Midge urges her not to quit, as she's clearly happy. Susie walks past and just laughs. Midge says she'll tell her mother what happened over a bottle of sherry.
Abe, Rose, and Midge return home, only to find Frank waiting in the hall. Midge urges her parents inside.
Frank explains that Mei Lin's family is too hot, and they are through investigating. Midge's neighbor Julie appears, startling Frank, and he pulls a gun on her, but Midge assures her it's fake, saying Frank is sometimes her comedy partner.
Julie goes into her apartment. Frank urges Midge not to go snooping around Mei's family and not to tell anyone he and Nicky were doing it.
A highbrow fashion show takes place at the Kennedy event. The hostess introduces Midge. Midge does a set about how perfect Jackie Kennedy is and how it's unfair that ordinary women will have to live up to her.
Goaded by the crowd, she tells the story of the married man she slept with in great detail. Jackie starts crying. Midge stops, calling for the cake, but the damage is done, and the room has turned.
Midge calls Susie, asking about lunch the following day. Susie tells Midge she is firing Dinah tonight. Midge lets Susie know she will bring her cut of the gig that she got independently.
Dinah shows up, ready to go. Susie grabs all of Dinah's things and puts them into a bag, and then Dinah and Susie head out for dinner.
Dinah confesses that she picked that particular place so Susie could see James, a stand-up comedian. He's unpolished but funny.
Dinah takes Susie in the back to meet James. Susie says she wants to represent him. They agree to meet for lunch. Susie offers to take Dinah's stuff back, as Dinah will be coming back.
Joel and Moishe consult with Midge on the kids' Halloween costumes. Midge opens a package. It's her lucky dress, which Dinah got back for her. Moishe heads to the bar. Joel tells Midge he's going to tell his dad about Mei tonight.
Midge watches Gordon Ford. Lenny Bruce is on the show, talking about his upcoming show at Carnegie Hall. He pleads to the audience to come to his show and shills Nabisco products for Gordon Ford.
Joel and Moishe have a drink. Joel starts to tell Moishe about Mei and that they will get married. Archie watches the conversation from a distance. He sees Moishe faint and fall off the barstool. Joel and Archie start calling for a doctor.