Lou: I married a hooker. Needles: He married a hooker. I married a Russian mail order bride. Sean: Uh, I married Maggie. Needles: Which I'm banking on makes the hooker and the mail order bride seem sensible. Black Shawn: I'm marrying Colleen. Needles: Which is gonna make marrying Maggie look like a day at the beach. No offense, Tommy. Tommy: None taken. Franco: Yeah, well, I guess I could be considered a deadbeat dad. Needles: And a conspiracy freak. Mike: My gayness. Lou: The whole nun thing. Franco: Lesbo girlfriend. Mike: Extreme gayness. Needles: You know what's sad. Him being gay is the least of our public relations problems.