Friends Season 1 Quotes
Ross: (Picks up a surgical instrument) Quack quack. Quack quack. Quack.
Carol: Ross, that opens my cervix.
Monica you're scaring me. You're getting all chaotic and twirly... and not in a good way.
Phoebe
(On phone) Hi Mindy. Hi it's Rachel. Yeah, fine. I saw Barry today. Uh, yeah, yeah, he told me. No, well it's okay. Really. It's okay, really. I hope you two are very happy. I really do, and well Min, ya know, if everything works out and you guys end up getting married and having kids and everything... I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose.
Rachel
Ross: (Discussing baby names) What about Julia?
Carol: Julia!
Susan: We agreed on Minnie.
Ross: It's funny, we (Gestures to Carol) agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together. Things change, roll with the punches!
Monica: What you guys don't understand is that kissing is more important than any other part of it for us.
Joey: Yeah, right. (They all stare at him) You're serious?
Phoebe: Oh, yeah.
Rachel: Everything that you need to know is in that first kiss.
Monica: Absolutely.
Chandler: Yeah, I think for us, kissing is an opening act, you know, like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.
Ross: Yeah, yeah. And it's not like that we don't like the comedian. It's just that that's not why we bought the ticket.
Chandler: You see, the problem is though, after the concert over, no matter how great the show was you girls are always looking for the comedian again. You know, and we're in the car, fighting traffic, basically just trying to stay awake.
Rachel: Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home listening to that album alone. (High-fives Monica)
Joey: Are we still talking about sex?
Joey: All right, when did ya have it on last?
Phoebe: Doy! Probably right before she lost it!
Chandler: You don't get a lot of "doy" these days.
I'm not going to tell you, how much they spent on that wedding. But forty thousand dollars is a lot of money.
Jack
Monica: Chandler, you are the only child. Right? You don't have any of this.
Chandler: Well no. Although I had an imaginary friend, who my parents actually preferred.
Rachel: (With a worried look, thinking she has lost her ring) Has anybody seen my engagement ring?
Phoebe: Yeah. It's beautiful.
Ross: So what's new? Still...
Carol: A lesbian?
Ross: Well... you never know!
Monica: (Cleaning frantically) Whose little ball of paper is this?
Chandler: Oh, that would be mine. See, I wrote a note to myself, then I realized I didn't need the note. So I balled it up and now I wish I was dead.
Ross: They want me to go down to this sonogram thing with them tomorrow. Remember back when life was simpler and she was just a lesbian?
Chandler: Ah, those were the days.
