Friends Season 2 Quotes
Monica: (Discussing the seashell lamp) Did you know I'm allergic to shellfish?
Rachel: Well, then you'll just have to eat the other lamps.
Monica: (To Chandler): You are not a freak. You're a guy.
Chandler: And now I have to get a snake.
Phoebe: Ah huh...why is that?
Chandler: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing. Y'know, a hook; like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be crazy man with a snake! Y'know, Crazy Snake Man! And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids won't walk past my place they will run! "Run away from Crazy Snake Man!!" they'll shout!
Ross: Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Okay? I can tell you, we have collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution of different species, okay? You can literally see them evolving through time.
Phoebe: Really? You can actually see it?
Ross: You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.
Phoebe: See, I didn't know that.
Ross: Well, there you go.
Phoebe: Huh. So now, the real question is, who put those fossils there, and why.
Joey: (Joey reads Mr Heckles' book) Hey, there's me! April 17th. Excessive noise. Italian guy comes homes with a date. Hey Chandler, look, you're in here too.
Chandler: April 18th, excessive noise. Italian guy's gay roommate brings home dry-cleaning.
Chandler: I reject anyone who's crazy enough to actually go out with me, and then I bitch about the fact that there aren't any great women out there.
Rachel: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with.
Monica: You're not a freak, you're a guy.
(To Monica) What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
Rachel
Phoebe: Uh-oh. It's Scary Scientist Man.
Ross: What? Okay, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase, I carry actual scientific facts. A briefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
Phoebe: Okay, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, okay? I'm just saying that it's one of the possibilities.
Ross: What? It's the only possibility, Phoebe.
Phoebe: Okay, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, okay? Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And up until, like, what, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split it open, and this, like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you could be wrong about this?
Ross: There might be, a teeny, tiny, possibility.
Phoebe: I can't believe you caved.
Ross: What?
Phoebe: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? (Ross leaves upset) Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
(To Phoebe) One plus one equals two. I can't just stand by and let you think that one plus one might equal three or four or yellow!
Ross
Ross: Pheebs, you see how I'm making these little toys move? Opposable thumbs. Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?
Phoebe: Maybe the overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts.
Joey: When I first moved to the city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but she had the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.
Chandler: (To Ross) You or me?
Ross: I got it. Uh, Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.
Joey: You guys are messing with me, right?
Everyone: Yeah.
Carol: You think my breast milk's gross?
Susan: Oh, this should be fun.
Ross: No no, Carol... it's just that I don't think breast milk is for adults.
Chandler: Although, the packaging does appeal to adults and kids alike.
