Gilmore Girls Season 1 Episode 9: "Rory's Dance" Quotes
Emily: If she doesn't want to go [to the Chilton dance], then it must be because of something you said.
Lorelai: Mom, I promise, all I ever said to her about dances is that you go, you dance, you have punch, you eat, you take a picture, and then you get auctioned off to a biker gang from Sausalito.
Dean:He has a thing for you.
Rory:No he doesn't. It's just a game to him or something
Dean:He has a thing for you.
Rory:He does nothing but insult me and make me miserable.
Dean:He has a thing for you.
Rory: He's not my boyfriend.
Lane: Really?
Rory: No.
Lane: What is he then?
Rory: He's my...gentleman caller
Lane: Ok, Blanche.
Emily: (on the phone) No, I won't be coming home tonight.
(Lorelai groans)
Emily: (speaking to Lorelai) Was that a pain?
Lorelai: Yes, a big one.
Emily: Okay Rory, come out here please.
(Rory comes into the room using a napkin as a bib and eating a taco)
Rory: Hey Grandma
Emily: (speaking to Lorelai) She's lived with you too long.
Lorelai: Honey, lose the bib and the taco, put your shoes on come back out, and let grandma take the pretty picture.
Rory: You know what, I don't want my change, money makes people shallow.
(Rory walks away)
Paris: I've got your change. Hey! Hey! If you think I'm keeping this dollar, I'm not!
Boy next to Paris: I'll take it.
Paris: Shut up!
Dean: So are you asking me to go to a dance with you?
Rory: No... Yes... I mean... if you wanted to go, I would go too.
Dean: That would probably be good since it's your school.
Rory: Well it's this thing where you go and they play music and you're supposed to get all dressed up and do some kind of dance and then there's chicken.
Dean: Chicken?
Rory: Well I don't know if there's chicken. But at these kinds of things they often serve chicken because it's probably cheaper and people eat it, so the logic behind the chicken choice really isn't that bad.
Dean: I'm lost.
Rory: It's a dance.
Dean: You don't want to fight me Tristan.
Tristan: Why not?
Dean: Because I will kill you, idiot!
Emily: Lorelai, I have watched you do a lot of stupid things, and I have held my tongue.
Lorelai: What?
Emily: But I am not going to just stand back and watch you let that girl ruin her life.
Lorelai: Mom, back off.
Emily: She's going to get pregnant.
Lorelai: No she's not.
Emily: She's going to ruin everything, just like you ruined everything.
Lorelai: No she's not, no she's not, no she's NOT! Rory is a good kid, Mom--she's not me!
Lorelai: What were you thinking? Staying out all night? Are you CRAZY?
Rory: I'm sorry. It was an accident.
Lorelai: You're talking to the queen of staying out all night, okay? I invented the concept, you cannot do this. Period!
Rory: Nothing happened! We fell asleep!
Lorelai: (shouting) C'mon already!
Rory: (from in her room) I'm primping!
Lorelai: You're sixteen, you've skin like a baby's ass, there's nothing to primp!
Rory: OK, OK, here I come!
(Rory walks down the hall to Lorelai, looking very lovely in her evening gown)
Lorelai: Wow, someone hit you with a pretty stick!
