Classic TV Quotes: Friends Season Two

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Season two of the quintessential sitcom, Friends, was definitely one of the most memorable in the show's history.  Despite premiering with Ross' new girlfriend, introducing Rachel's Ross clone, Russ, the season was primarily about Ross and Rachel finally discovering their mutual feelings.

Ross and Russ Pic

Along the way, the rest of the Friends cast had plenty of their own defining moments including Joey being cast as Dr. Drake Ramoray, Monica dating her parents' friend, Richard, and Chandler getting a creepy new roommate, Eddie.

Having already achieved mainstream success with its first season, the sophomore season also contained plenty of guest stars including Jean-Claude Van Damme, Julia Roberts, Brooke Shields, Tom Selleck, and Charlie Sheen.

So what do you have to do for the next hour?  Go ahead and browse the most complete collection of Friends quotes and check out some of our favorites from season two:

Chandler: Joey's tailor... took advantage of me.
Ross: What?
Joey: No way, I've been going to the guy for twelve years.
Chandler: Oh come on, he said he was going to do my inseem, then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite...
Ross: What? (Chandler closes his eyes)
Chandler: Cupping.
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side then they move it back, and then they do the rear. Ross, will you tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
Ross: Yes, yes it is... in prison! | permalink
Carol: You think my breast milk's gross?
Susan: Oh, this should be fun.
Ross: No no, Carol... it's just that I don't think breast milk is for adults.
Chandler: Although, the packaging does appeal to adults and kids alike. | permalink
Julie: You know, in some cultures, having a third nipple is actually a sign of virility. You get the best huts and women dance naked around you.
Chandler: Huh. Are any of these cultures perchance in the tri-state area? | permalink
Joey: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say he never has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea?
Phoebe: Mm... hmm.
Joey: This man is my god! | permalink
Joey: Ross, listen. I got two words for you: Threesome.
Chandler: You still got one word left if you want to use it. | permalink
Chandler: You know, I remember my father... all dressed up in the red suit, with the big black boots and the leather belt. Sneaking around downstairs, he didn't want anybody to see him, but he'd be drunk so he'd stumble, crash into something and wake everybody up.
Rachel: That doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas.
Chandler: Who said anything about Christmas? | permalink
Joey: My agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!
Phoebe: Oh, well, we have to celebrate. You know what we should do? We should do, like, a soap opera theme.
Chandler: Yeah, we could all sleep together and then one of us could get amnesia. | permalink
Chandler: Stick a fork in me, I'm done.
Phoebe: Stick a fork what?
Chandler: You know, like when you're cooking a steak.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't eat meat.
Chandler: Well how do you tell when vegetables are done?
Phoebe: Well you just, you know, you eat them and you can tell.
Chandler: Okay, then eat me, I'm done. | permalink
Joey: Some girl ate Monica!
Monica: Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
Chandler: Ah, so how many cameras are actually on you? | permalink
Phoebe: You have to stay back, 'cause, I have the pox.
Ryan: Chicken or small?
Phoebe: Chicken. Which is so ironic, considering that I'm a vegetarian. | permalink

Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.

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Friends Quotes

Rachel: Do you think it's easy for me to see you with somebody else?
Ross: You know what, hey! You're the one who ended it! Remember?
Rachel: Yeah, because I was mad at you! Not because I stopped loving you!

Rachel: Daddy! Daddy listen to me! It's like all my life everyone's told me, "You're a shoe! You're a shoe! You're a shoe!" Well, what if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I wanna be a purse or a hat? No I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a hat. It's a metaphor Daddy!
Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.