The Sopranos' second season picked up just a few short months after with Tony at the head of the DiMeo crime family.  The primary storylines involved Junior and Richie Aprile trying to usurp power from Tony and the season culminated with the FBI busting Tony just before Meadow's graduation.

Along the way, Tony and his crew uttered plenty of great lines and now we're giving you a chance to talk like a mafioso with our best of the second season of The Sopranos quotes.  So go ahead and vote for your favorites and check out some of ours below:

Bobby: To the victor belongs the spoils.
Tony: Why don't you get the f**k out of here before I shove your quotation book up your fat f**king ass. | permalink

Janice: There's a Zuni saying: "For every twenty wrongs a child does, ignore nineteen."
Tony: There's an old Italian saying: "You f**k up once, you lose two teeth." | permalink

[Angie is planning on getting divorced]
Carmela: So what did the lawyer say?
Angie: He said I have a good case. We're filing Tuesday.
Carmela: So you're going to take Monday to think. That's good.
Angie: Monday's a Jewish holiday. | permalink

Tony: (to AJ after he throws a phone) Forgot to tell you I got a job at Radio Shack. Product testing. Giving that phone a F for durability. | permalink

Dr. Melfi: Now that you found out that you have a retarded family member, do you feel better about coming here?
Tony: What?
Dr. Melfi: Is it permissable now? Is it enough of a sad tragedy that you can join the rest of the douchebags? | permalink

Carmela: You stole my car? Where is the trust in this house?
AJ: When I get confirmed I'm going to be a man. So how come I can't drive?
Tony: You really want to get into this? Who was that man we had to pick up at camp last year for bed wetting? | permalink

Meadow: There are more Nobel Prize winners in the San Francisco bay area than anywhere on the planet.
Tony: Nobel Prize for what? Packing fudge? | permalink

Paulie: You didn't go to hell. You went to purgatory, my friend.
Christopher: I forgot about purgatory.
Paulie: Purgatory--a little detour on the way to paradise.
Christopher: How long do you think we've got to stay there?
Paulie: That's different for everybody. You add up all your mortal sins and multiply that number by 50. Then you add up all your venial sins and multiply that by 25. You add that together and that's your sentence. I figure I'm gonna have to do 6,000 years before I get accepted into heaven and 6,000 years is nothin' in eternity terms. I can do that standing on my head. It's like a couple of days here. | permalink

Neil: The feds are a business, Anthony. Millions of tax dollars invested in watching your ass. Sooner or later, just like you, they're going to want a return on that investment. | permalink

Tony: How many jobs have you had in this lifetime?
Janice: Enough to know I don't want another one. | permalink

Tony: What is that?
Irina: Chicken Soup for the Soul.
Tony: You should read Tomato Sauce for your Ass. It's the Italian version. | permalink

Dr. Melfi: So who's your friend? Pussy?
Tony: I'm confused.
Dr. Melfi: Is Pussy your friend?
Tony: Yeah.
Dr. Melfi: But that's the friend who was almost carried off by the ducks, right?
Tony: When you say p***y do you mean my friend Pussy or do you mean p***y?
Dr. Melfi: Whatever seems to be dominating your thoughts.
Tony: I got p***y on the brain. I always do. | permalink

Eric Hochberger is the programmer of TV Fanatic, so please forgive his mediocre writing. His programming is far better. Follow him on Twitter and/or email him. Just don't request threaded comments. They're coming.